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Speeding
it up The speed-dating procedure is this: a singleton will sign up with an organiser, paying a small sum for a specific ‘event’ that caters for their age-group. The event will host 20 potential lovers in a trendy bar with ten tables. The girls will be seated at a table and the men will have exactly three minutes to sit and converse with each in turn, interrupted by a buzzer which moves them onto the next one. After each three minute chat the participants mark on a score-sheet ‘yes’ or ‘no’ depending on whether they were attracted to that person or not. After the meeting the organiser collects all the sheets and contacts the participants giving the email addresses of any couples who gave a mutual ‘yes’, leaving the opportunity for further contact to be made. Granted, it seems shockingly shallow, but with increasingly less time for workers in the city to play the ‘dating game’, (and English men being particularly reserved in the bar situation), it could make some sense. However, the big question remains: can you really judge compatibility from three measly minutes? Apparently you can. According to the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, people decide what kind of relationship they want within minutes of meeting. They say it takes only three minutes to decide whether we will fall in love, remain friends or never speak again. Researchers at Ohio University studied 170 new undergraduates. They found that after three minutes of conversation they were able to predict how well they would get on with fellow students. “It seems we make a prediction about what kind of relationship we could have with a person very quickly, and that helps determine how much effort we are willing to put into developing a relationship,” said Professor Ramirez. In the survey the students were given either three, six or ten minutes to talk to each other before making a prediction as to how they thought the relationship would develop. Researchers found those who chatted for three minutes were as successful at predicting the outcome as those who spent longer together. Students were also asked to predict which type of relationship they thought they would share with the person. Nine weeks later researchers discovered almost all the predictions were correct. “Scientists theorise that it is part of a sub-conscious bid to save time,” writes Mark Prigg of the UK’s Evening Standard and he concludes that speed dating may even be the best way to formulate an accurate opinion of a future partner. But would a scheme like this be successful in Colombo? Andre, 27, from Kollupitiya says, “Definitely, and it would save so much time. It sounds better than online dating where you don’t actually see the person; physical appearance is important, no matter what people say otherwise.” Twenty-three-year-old Kiara from Mt. Lavinia says, “It wouldn’t work, because our culture is such that only a minority are aware of and participate in the dating game, but the majority are not exposed to this. It would attract the wrong kind of guys, give them the wrong impression, and may even be dangerous for the girls involved.” Her friend Sasha disagreed saying, “It’s not dangerous if it’s only email addresses that are given, but the real problem is that the Colombo social scene is fairly small – there’s always someone who knows someone else. Nothing’s a secret for long.” So, perhaps Sri Lanka is not quite ready for the hurry-quick chat-then-tick idea that is speed-dating. Although, it might be worth noting that with the changing attitude towards relationships and the evident void of such organised rendezvous in Colombo, there could be some serious rupees to be earned in the near future for a business-minded romantic. Maybe the three-minute matchmaker could change the classified pages forever… |
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