Mirror Magazine

Mirror Magazine

Women vs. women
By The Scribe
Women have for decades been up in arms against men for being the ‘spoke in the wheel’ in their never ending pursuit of equal rights! As easy as it is to conclude that males are undoubtedly the foe, ever thought of searching a little bit closer to home? Say… members belonging to our own ‘turf,’ for instance???

Where oh where should I even begin…? Women have been women’s own worst enemies for centuries now, but not much light has even been shed on this aspect of female suppression. Why? Well… just off the top of my head I’d have to say that men look so much better in the role of the ‘Big Bad Wolf’, plus the fact that it would undermine the female cause, if the ‘mutiny’ within the ranks is exposed, don’t you think?

Thus, women have downplayed or turned a blind eye to the very significant role women play in repressing their own kind. However, until and unless this aspect of counter productivity from within is dealt with comprehensively, no amount of feminist enlightenment can ever make any headway. As long as there are women playing a double game (metaphorically speaking), no resolve can or will be sustained.

Let’s get right down to the basics, shall we? Where do most, if not all of us, get our initial perspectives /viewpoints from? Our parents, of course. This pair generally comprises both a male and female counterpart, yes? Well, as much as we love to point fingers at our fathers for being a ‘typical man,’ and not raising a finger to help around the house (which is most often the case). Ever questioned the origin of such behaviour patterns, and how and why they have come into being? Well, I have. And believe you me it’s quite a bitter reality to digest. However, it is one that must be addressed.

In the ‘average’ home, there’s a gender-based division of labour right from day one. The girl will help out in the kitchen and around the house, and the boy will help his father do the ‘manly’ chores, such as wash the car or fix gadgets in the house (if at all, that is). Although, it might seem to be the obvious delegation of duties, the repercussion of such stereotypes can have a significant impact on both children. The girl grows up with the misconception that it is part and parcel of her role as a woman; a prerequisite of sorts to be the perfect little house keeper. Furthermore, she’s made to understand that in the case of failing to live up to this notion, she may as well consider herself a failure as a woman. On the other hand, a boy grows up with the ‘ultra-flawed’ perception that such ‘menial’ chores are not part of his terrain, and thus, need not be ventured into.

Unfortunately most mothers, not only nurture these beliefs, but worse yet endorse them! Even in most cases of domestic violence, a mother tends to question her own daughter’s fidelity or if she could have possibly done something deserving of a beating or abusive tirade from her spouse. Doesn’t that even go against the very core of motherly instincts? How could it have come to such a state that social norms have actually managed to distort a mother’s mind to such an extent that society means more than their own flesh and blood?

Guess what else brutal and gruesome discriminatory acts such as dowry killings and sathi pooja have in common other than for both being age-old traditions? Women. Mothers-in-law, sisters-in-law, mothers, sisters – all women, but all so steeped in tradition that they forget who they are. So immersed in social standards that they’re even willing to kill their own in the name of ‘honour.’
This is by no means trying to take the onus off men. They are by and large one of the biggest obstacles women have had to face over the years. Yet having to fight against your own, for the greater good of your own, just doesn’t seem worth it, don’t you think?

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