Police dog has its day

Those at the Presidential Palace had a hearty laugh the other day when the brother-in-law related an incident at the Kuala Lumpur international airport a few days previously.

Three Sri Lankans were on their way back from Roman Catholic Philippines, among them an ex-chairman of the national airline and an Opposition MP. In KL, they were to board a flight on the national carrier back to Colombo, the poor MP having an Economy class ticket. The ex-chairman thought he could get an upgrade given all his 'credentials'. Boldly he went to the counter and introduced himself as a director of the airline.

He asked, nay demanded, an upgrade for the MP. Unfortunately his writ does not run anymore, and the unfortunate MP was relegated to the back of the aircraft. The question people in High Places asked was why the difference could not have been paid and the MP upgraded.

Foreign Minister Rohitha Bogollagama is due to leave for New York next week to canvass for votes from the UN's 192 member states in the run-up to the elections to the Human Rights Council on May 21. Sri Lanka, which is completing its three year term, is running for re-election against Bahrain, East Timor, Japan, Pakistan and South Korea. There are six Asian countries vying for four seats. When Mahinda Samarasinghe, who fancies himself as the Minister for Human Rights at the UN and who is eyeing Bogollagama's job, claimed last month that he had met with 50 ambassadors when he was in New York seeking votes for Sri Lanka. Bogollagama obviously wants to outdo Samarasinghe. So, one Foreign Ministry source says, instructions have gone to the Sri Lanka Mission in New York to ensure that Bogollagama meets about 51 ambassadors: at least one up, over Samarasinghe.

With consistent rumours that the Foreign Ministry will be split into two, one former diplomat proposes the portfolio be evenly divided into a Minister (Foreign) and a Minister (Affairs). Guess, who is best suited for affairs-- both foreign and domestic?.

At least six to eight drivers, some from Kurunegala and Nikaweratiya, are due to leave for overseas postings in Sri Lanka missions abroad. But most of them are least qualified for their jobs or even capable of reading traffic signs. And those who can drive, cannot read, and those who can read, cannot drive.

On his return from a recent overseas visit, UNP MP Jayalath Jayawardena stopped at a duty free shop at Katunayaka airport and told a sales assistant that there was one item he badly wanted, and that was rice. “There’s no rice available in the market, so I wanted to buy some from here,” said the MP, speaking with more than a touch of irony.

A VIP has moved into the Jawatta Road neighbourhood, in Colombo 5 to live in a house he is said to have bought for Rs. 200 million. The three-wheeler drivers in the area are now grumbling that they have had to move their base of operations because of special security arrangements for the VIP. At this rate, with people being asked to move out every time a VIP moves in, the Not So Very Important Persons will soon have no place to go.

At Thursday’s weekly Cabinet media briefing, Minister of Export Development Cegu Issadeen surprised everyone present by making detailed predictions of the outcome of the Eastern Provincial Council election, scheduled for May 10.

He declared that the UPFA would win with 19 seats, and that the UNP/SLMC would gain 15 seats. Asked what he based his election predictions on, Minister Issadeen cited past experience.

Lions roar at attempt to curb expenditure

A row broke out at a recent meeting of the elite Lions Sports Club, when members unanimously squashed an attempt to impose a limit on members’ monthly spending. Members expressed their appreciation of the deft chairing of the meeting by the Chairman Pro Temp, who they said had correctly gauged the mood of the house. The talk is that the club’s next big spat will be about who should and should not be permitted to enjoy a walk on the club’s exclusive grounds. It is understood that top professionals and captains of industry currently enjoying this privilege have expressed indignation that their privilege was being threatened.

Odds and Ends