Times 2

Behind every successful man is a woman keeping out of the way

By Jenny Hope

The secret of success may be a spouse who stands at your side - but keeps out of the way, psychologists claim. Whether you are the Prime Minister, or simply trying to stick to a diet, the best support comes from those who offer practical help without making a fuss.

New research suggests that, contrary to the traditional image, a loving and supportive partner can sometimes get in the way of achieving your goals. The more supportive they are, the more the other person relies on them - and by doing so makes less of an effort themselves, says the U.S. study in the journal Psychological Science.

Quiet strength: Experts say it is better to offer unobtrusive help behind the scenes, much Samantha Cameron appears to do for David

Researchers Grainne Fitzsimons and Eli Finkel describe the process as 'self-regulatory outsourcing' - the unconscious reliance on someone else to move your goals forward, coupled with a relaxation of your own effort.

It is most common when someone has a partner urging them forward but can equally apply to friends and family members, they claim. It is better to offer unobtrusive help behind the scenes, much as Denis Thatcher did for his Prime Minister wife and as Samantha Cameron appears to do for the current PM, said Dr Fitzsimons.

'Our study shows there are positive and negative consequences to being supportive, but you can be subtle about it rather than being bossy,' she said. 'For example, you can offer to babysit so your partner can get to the gym or take over the chores before an important meeting, and these contributions make the relationship stronger.'

The researchers came to their conclusions after three online experiments involving 216 people, focusing on the ways partners supported their loved ones.

© Daily Mail, London

Top to the page  |  E-mail  |  views[1]
SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend
 
Other Times 2 Articles
People power explosion in Arab world
US vetoes UN resolution on Israeli settlements
No easy love for Philippine Presidents
Mind-moved bionic arm goes on display in US
Pakistan court reissues warrant on Musharraf
Harry: Make me best man or I'm not coming
Early Britons were cannibals
Is it a bird? Is it a plane?
Behind every successful man is a woman keeping out of the way
The largest solar flare in four years may damage electrical grids on Earth
Honest cabbie returns $100,000 of jewellery to passenger
A drug to make your hair grow again — and that's the bald truth
Unfair, unclear and a massive backward step for democracy
British PM, deputy clash over referendum
US gunslinger with immunity
Was Davis running Drone programme in Pakistan?
2G Scam: The buck stops at DMK
And free flows the Nile
The bat tle of Bahrain: King Hamad - the Mubarak of the Gulf
Israel could become the scapegoat of Egypt's new democracy
The Arab Revolution deals a blow to 'Project Israel'
Guests were naked at Berlusconi’s bunga bunga
UN urges Cambodia,Thailand ceasefire, but will it happen?
Iraq shelter bombed by US remains frozen in time
Mongolia's 'ninja miners' strike gold

 

 
Reproduction of articles permitted when used without any alterations to contents and a link to the source page.
© Copyright 1996 - 2011 | Wijeya Newspapers Ltd.Colombo. Sri Lanka. All Rights Reserved | Site best viewed in IE ver 8.0 @ 1024 x 768 resolution