My Dear Pavithra, I thought I must write to you because the entire country appears to be blaming the increase in electricity rates on you and no one seems to realise that you were given this thankless job only a few months ago. Some people are behaving as if you and you alone are responsible [...]

5th Column

Playing political power games

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My Dear Pavithra,

I thought I must write to you because the entire country appears to be blaming the increase in electricity rates on you and no one seems to realise that you were given this thankless job only a few months ago.

Some people are behaving as if you and you alone are responsible for the electricity rates increase and they are finding fault with you as if the increased revenue from the rate increase in electricity rate will go to your pocket!

Don’t worry, Pavithra, the truth always wins and the people will forgive you when they realise that all this is not your fault. And the bitter truth is that the Blues always wanted to raise the rates but they couldn’t do so until they got rid of Champika. That is why they appointed you for the job.

After all, this was a job that more seasoned campaigners like Susil, your Uncle John and even Champika found difficult. So why else would Mahinda maama give you the job when you don’t even know the difference between Kerawalapitiya and Norochcholai?

So, Mahinda maama found someone who would say ‘Yes, Sir’ to whatever he says-and gave you the post. And you, being the innocent lady that you are, were thrilled that you were being a given such a high profile position, little knowing what you were in for.

There will of course be those who will be quite happy to see you in distress. Uncle John, your rival in the Ratnapura district with whom you fought a losing battle to become ‘No. 1’ in the preference list, must be delighted especially since he too was being blamed for our power crisis at one time.

Then there is Champika who goes around issuing statements saying that the increase in rates is not his brainchild. He is correct, of course, but what he does not want to say is that it is not your bright idea as well! But you need not worry, Pavithra. I am sure Mahinda maama-who never forgets those who are loyal to him-will reward you in time to come and he is sure to remember you as one of those loyal people who took the flak on his behalf.

And our dear voters who are electricity users as well, being the extremely intelligent people that they are, will forget about all this because there are other issues that will attract their interest in the weeks and months to come. For instance, instead of worrying about rising electricity rates they should be marveling at the miracle of your parliamentary colleague, young Duminda, who must have made medical history this week for him to be granted bail.

Why, one day we are told that he cannot be held in prison because he is so ill and that he must be kept in hospital at all times to protect him from germs that would otherwise cause life-threatening infections.

The very next day, when he was granted bail, we are told that he has made a miraculous recovery overnight and that he is fit to return home. If only he made that recovery a day earlier he would have had to go to prison but with miracles like this, Pavithra, who needs to worry about electricity prices?

I am not sure whether you realised it, Pavithra, but there was another event that took place this week that will mean nothing but good news for you-the Commonwealth decided to go ahead with their summit in Colombo later this year, despite opposition from countries like Canada.

Now you might wonder why that would be good news for you but just imagine the amount of money it would cost us to host this summit-and the amount of electricity it would use up when all of Colombo’s streets, trees and walkways would be lit up for the summit?
When the country is spending such a colossal amount of money for that summit, no one would be able to blame you for rising electricity prices. Of course we will be paying through our noses at a time we can ill-afford to, but that is a small price to pay to get some publicity for Mahinda maama, isn’t it?

So, Pavithra, believe me, there is no need to worry or panic. The rathu sahodarayas will stage a few street protests and the most that the Greens can do is light some candles. But give it a few weeks and all will be forgotten and this will be Paradise once more-and you will still have your job!

Yours truly,
Punchi Putha.

PS-If you play your cards right, you can even become Minister-in-Attendance to Queen Elizabeth if she does attend the summit in November. There are only two female ministers in the cabinet and I am sure you can beat Sumedha to the job any day-and you sure have the power and energy for the task!




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