5th Column

My dear Satellite,
I thought I must write to you because you are in the news once again, be it lecturing Mahinda maama on what he should do if he wants to return to active politics or being hooted while attending public meetings. Ah, there is no such thing as bad publicity, is there?

Satellite, I heard that you were instrumental in having more ministers sworn in, so that Maithri will have some degree of support from the Blues. As you know, some of them still want to follow Mahinda maama and challenge Maithri’s mandate to lead the party and the country.

If that is so, how did SB sneak in to that list, Satellite? We all know how much you value SB. In fact, at the last campaign he painted quite a picture of you. You refused to give his oaths as a minister when you were the boss and he was in the Green camp. So, what has changed now?

But then, some things do change, don’t they? For instance, it was you who first promised to abolish the Executive Presidency more than twenty years ago. Why, the rathu sahodarayas even withdrew their man from the election because they thought you will honour that undertaking.

You didn’t, even after ten years in office. In fact, you wanted to stay in office for one more year and it was Sarath — who was then Mahinda maama’s friend — who decided otherwise. But here you are now, trying your best to get it done through Maithri. I suppose it is better late than never, as they say!

We also remember how you fought with Uncle Ranil when you were the boss and he was the PM. Why, when he was overseas you suddenly took over three ministries and appointed your own people to look after them. Then you dissolved Parliament and sacked his government, after just two years.

Now though, from what we hear, the two of you seem to be working marvellously together to try and get this ‘100-day’ plan working. We have heard that politics makes strange bedfellows, but even then, we find this partnership amusing. So, it is no wonder some people are calling this ‘ege wairaya’!

Or is it that you finally want to be remembered as a leader who did something for the country? JR changed the economy, Premadasa did a lot for the less fortunate and Mahinda maama won the war. On the other hand, the greatest achievement during your era was winning the cricket World Cup!

Even if that was the reason, Satellite, it doesn’t matter. The Blue camp has many rogues and it seems as if Mahinda maama looked the other way as long as they were loyal to him. Someone needs to clean up the Blue camp and if you can help Maithri do it, maybe that is what you will be remembered for.

We also hear you berating Mahinda maama and telling him that if he wants to return to Parliament, he should submit an application, like everyone else. You also point out that once you left office, you retired and didn’t interfere with the work of your successor, just like JR and DB did before you.

That is so true, Satellite and we do appreciate that but it also makes me a bit worried. Here you are, making a comeback ten years after your retirement and trying to take matters into your own hand. Does that mean that Mahinda maama will also try to make a comeback, ten years from now?

Anyway, now that the courts have decided that most of the proposed changes to the Presidency can be ratified by Parliament, I hope you can muster enough support from the Blues, to ensure that they are passed with a two-thirds majority. If you can do that, Satellite, maybe we can forgive your past sins!

That is because we are finding that the ‘yahapaalanaya’ that was promised hasn’t quite worked out in the way people wanted it to. There is confusion everywhere; we don’t know which party is governing and which party is in the Opposition. We have ended up with a ‘haya paalanaya’ instead.

Maithri says all that will end after general elections are held and we sincerely hope so. And then, we hope you will return to your retirement, because that this is the best thing you can do. If you do stay on, I’m afraid there will be more incidents like the one at Kurunegala, where some people hooted at you.

Some say you will play a role like Sonia does in India. After all, like her, your husband too was assassinated. Sonia, however, wants to continue her dynasty but you have no such plans for your children, do you? As you ponder your future, Satellite, we expect you to decide wisely about that.

Yours truly,
Punchi Putha
PS: We do hope that all your recent actions are motivated by good intentions and not by your dislike for Mahinda maama. After all an ‘eye for an eye makes the whole world blind’ and you should know about that better than most of us, having lost an eye during that horrific blast at Town Hall…