5th Column

My dear Ravi,
I thought of writing to you when I heard that the budget you presented in Parliament had been passed – by a two thirds majority at that! It reminds us of the times when Ronnie used to present budgets during the JR era and get them approved by a two-thirds majority with hardly a whimper of protest!
I’m sure you must be a relieved man after what happened last year. That was when almost each and every one of your budget proposals were changed or scrapped because of pressure from not only the opposition but also from the Greens and Blues on your own side. That was very embarrassing for you.
There was nothing of that sort this year, even though you were trying to balance the books and had to find the money from somewhere. You also had to make sure that whatever tax you imposed, it should not be called ‘VAT’. Considering all this, you have done a pretty good job and I will tell you why.

You can boast that you gave everyone a good deal because you reduced the prices of several essential items. Of course, what you didn’t tell everyone is that because of all the direct and indirect taxes you have now imposed, the cost of living would go up anyway- but that is for them to find out, isn’t it?
I suppose the best aspect of the budget is that you will be providing a free ‘tablet’ for every single Advanced Level student in the country. So, just as much as the late CWW went into the history books as our father of free education, you can now claim that you are the father of free ‘tablet’ education.

What is not obvious is that, even though you gave free tablets for students to go on the internet, you also raised the taxes on internet fees. Now, most people will realise that only when they get their internet bills and then they will get to know that the free tablet is in fact a bitter pill to swallow!
However, Ravi, it is a pity that you decided to limit your ‘tablet’ offer only to Advanced Level students and not, for example, to those attending grade eight. Because of your decision, most of our future parliamentarians will not get one, because only a few of them get beyond grade eight!

If our parliamentarians are unhappy about that, you can tell them you did try to help them out. Why, you have now imposed a fee on anyone trying to file a case against anybody. At the rate our MPs are getting charged, the only people who will benefit by this would be them and not the average citizen.
Besides, you have already helped them by giving them vehicle permits which they are now selling to other people. Previously, Rajitha and the Field Marshal have told us they cannot serve the people well if they didn’t travel in luxury vehicles, so these MPs must not be serving their voters at all!

If your MPs are still unhappy, I think they will become friendlier when they hear that the Green Man is planning a salary hike for them too. I think he is getting teased at home by Maithree because he told us the other day that she gets a higher salary than he does, but we shouldn’t be worrying about that!
Of course, those in the opposition who are always saying that they are fighting for the people will be very unhappy about this proposed pay hike and I’m almost certain that people like Wimal, Vasu and Udaya will vote against it. Why, even if it is approved by Parliament, I’m sure they will refuse it too!
Ravi, I noticed that you had increased the tax on people leaving the country to try and get some more money for the Treasury but I think you may have missed a trick there. You could have earned more money for the state coffers if you levied a tax on detained politicians leaving overseas for ‘treatment’!
Anyway, Ravi, you have done well. For some it is a surprise that you still have your job because of everything that has happened in relation to governors of the big bank, the COPE report and VAT. Now that you have a comfortably passed budget under your belt, you are safe for at least a year!
Yours truly,
Punchi Putha

PS: I really don’t know why you had to bring in fines for traffic offences into the Budget. You should have let roly-poly Nimal who looks after transport deal with that. That has all the potential of going haywire and ending up like the VAT and then it would have been Nimal with egg on his chubby face – now though, it looks like it will be you!