A woman’s most important job?
View(s):There is no question that a mother’s role in a child’s life is simply…incomparable. The importance she holds in shaping the life of that young mind and character and weight she carries in ensuring the child turns out to be the best possible version of him/herself is immeasurable. But what of the role of motherhood itself? Is it fair and just to say – as we hear being bandied about in many a forum and in many a land and cry – that a woman’s most important job is that of being a mother?
Recently, Amal Clooney, Human Rights lawyer, activist and wife of celebrity Hollywood actor George Clooney, addressed the United Nations to urge world leaders to speak out against acts of genocide. A most noble endeavour and she certainly has the credentials to do so. However the incident was hijacked by folk who thought it more important to focus on her four and a half inch high heeled shoes instead….simply because on this occasion, she was also – wait for it – Pregnant.
It still amazes me – and not in a good way – that somehow being pregnant is still seen as a “condition” as opposed to an extremely normal aspect of life for many women and has been since the time of man, but perhaps that is a topic of conversation for another day. However the matter that is relevant to this discussion is whether the important job Amal Clooney was there to do in her capacity as a Human Rights lawyer was somehow overshadowed by her impending future job of Motherhood. In order for that to have happened, is it so that somewhere deep in our psyche, there is a notion that being a mother is not one of several jobs a woman takes on, but rather it is her most important job. There is no question that it is and will always be supremely important and even the very cornerstone of a civilisation for obvious reasons, but should we instead be thinking that being a woman and being a fulfilled woman, playing the multiple roles that she chooses to take on, is as – or even more – important a job.
As freelance writer Jennifer Wright points out, “For women, their mothering skills are becoming an increasingly relevant topic of discussion. In the past year, women have been told either implicitly or explicitly that traditional roles are the ones they should be most focused on fulfilling…Being a parent is a source of joy and challenge and meaning for many humans of all genders. But it’s not the most important job there is. It’s not even technically a job, insofar as it pays no money. It is more like a very demanding volunteer position that you can never, ever get out of…and as rewarding as that position may be, producing a younger person is not necessarily the main contribution people make to the world. People can probably not tell you how many children Harriet Tubman or Marie Curie or Elizabeth Cady Stanton had, but they can, hopefully, tell you what they did…Society’s specific glorification of motherhood—the repeated emphasis that it is a woman’s most important job—implies that a woman’s main purpose is not to change the world. It’s not to write books or invent or be feminist abolitionists. It is just to serve as a vessel for younger women and future men…”
Jennifer elaborates further by saying, “This might be less offensive if anyone said being a father is a man’s most important job. But it’s always assumed that a father’s most important job might be something like… being the President…or walking on the moon…so, something quite important, really. This notion that motherhood is a woman’s most important job is a holdover from days when women couldn’t have many other jobs. And the glorification of a woman’s role as a mother has always been a breadcrumb intended to sate women who might otherwise demand to be more than mothers. From the early suffragette days, women who did not ask for rights were seen as good mothers, while women who did were seen as terrible mothers. This was a view espoused by people who would have had them be only mothers.”
Thankfully we have come a very long way since then, and whilst there are certainly reasons why it should have been important, the fact that the topic needed to be discussed in any sort of context is cause for concern.
So we come back to the question – what is the most important job a woman will ever have in her life…for some it will be in the capacity of family…raising her children to be good human beings…responsible and conscientious citizens who are a benefit to the society they inhabit and the world at large. For others it will be to be the best at the corporate or public sector job that they have worked tirelessly to master and the effort they have made to rise through the ranks and make a name for themselves…some will do their utmost to ensure that they fall into that very special group of people who are just seen to be able to just “do it all” and have it all…whether that actually happens in reality is another discussion altogether and many who appear to have it and do it all, will usually be the first to dispel the myth that any of it comes with ease and at little cost.
So, what is a woman’s most important job? Is it that of being a Daughter…Wife…Mother…D/L/E/A (Doctor/Lawyer/Engineer/Accountant)….Teacher…Corporate mogul…Astrophysicist…Artiste…Environmental activist…Cabaret star…Astrologer…a good/clever/funny/intelligent/accomplished/compassionate human being…..? The list is endless…but in the end – to me – a woman’s most important job is to be herself…and more importantly to be unquestionably allowed to be happy being….her BEST self.
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