5th Column

My dear elephants in the Green party,
I thought I must write to you after hearing of the plans to ‘reform’ or ‘restructure’ your party. Believe me, after the thrashing the ‘pohottuwa’ chaps gave the Greens at the recent local council elections and the jolt that the Green Man got from that motion of no-confidence, we expected some real changes.

Why, after the election loss when Maithri asked the Green Man to resign and he said ‘sack me if you can’, the Green man promised that there would be real change. He said he saw the election results as a wake-up call – a rather rude one at that – and I think we all agreed.

That was over two and a half months ago. We waited for the shake up, expecting a Cabinet reshuffle with a whole set of new faces but the only change we saw was Kabir and Kiri swapping their subjects. The Field Marshall didn’t get Law and Order either because Maithri refused to give him that ministry.

Then came the motion of no-confidence. We thought that your ‘reforms’ were delayed because you were tied up trying to protect the Green Man from being evicted from his Prime Ministerial chair. Why, there was even speculation that more than a dozen Greens were planning to vote against him.

Maithri stabbed the Green Man in the back and tried to get rid of him during the no-confidence motion, but Karu stood with the Green man and he survived, as he has done for twenty-five years. So, we thought you will want to form a government of your own without the Blues tagging along.

Instead, we are told that you want this inconvenient marriage to continue. You did get rid of the sixteen Blue chaps who voted against the Green Man but it is difficult to see what you would gain by having the ‘left-overs’ of the Blues on your side. Haven’t the last three years taught you anything?

If the Green Man thinks that he can win the next big election by keeping Maithri and Mahinda maama apart, the local elections proved him wrong. It is only a matter of time before Maithri realises that his days are numbered and teams up with Mahinda maama, possibly after another meal of hoppers!

Then, the Green Man resorted to his favourite tactic – appointing committee after committee to study how your party should be ‘reformed’. The findings of these committees are very interesting because, judging by what has been announced so far, nothing seems to have changed despite these ‘reforms’.

Pardon me, dear elephants in the Green Party, but we see the same people being shuffled around for the top posts in the party and a few new titles being created. If these are the only reforms that you have in mind, even Sumanadasa will be able to correctly predict the outcome of the next elections.

Correct me if I am wrong, elephants in the Green Party, but didn’t the Green Man, in one of his committee appointing sprees, appoint a ‘Marapana committee’ to decide what to do with Ravi? Didn’t that committee recommend that Ravi should keep away from party duties until his name is cleared?

So, how is it that Ravi gets to stay on as ‘assistant leader’, whatever that title means? Do you want to go to the next elections with an ‘assistant leader’ who says he didn’t know that his million rupees a month apartment was paid for by someone who has made billions selling big bank bonds on the sly?

Joseph Michael had the backbone to walk out in protest. He maybe past his prime, but the former speaker was in Parliament even before the Green Man, so he knows which way the tide is turning. Now, I wouldn’t be surprised if Ravi returns to the Cabinet – maybe even as Minister of Finance!

I heard Ravi say he is not bothered about ‘one or two people’ opposing his appointment. We all know that your party lost a few million votes – and the recent local elections – because of what Ravi was accused of doing. But then, we also know that for Ravi, a million or two is as trivial as ‘one or two’!

Elephants in the Green Party, you have had some great leaders and yours has been a great party. It is sad to see that party suffer such a plight, unable to differentiate between doing what is right for the country and the desire for self-preservation at all cost. Come 2020, and you will surely pay the price.

We can’t even wish you well, elephants of the Green party because the more you tell us that you will change, the more they have stayed the same and no one believes your promises anymore. No wonder Sajith is lying low, because he knows that 2020 is a lost cause – he must be preparing for 2025 instead!

Yours truly,
Punchi Putha
PS: You had one wake-up call with the local council elections but nothing meaningful was done. The no confidence motion was the next wake-up call and that too is being ignored. As someone once famously said, to lose out on one is a misfortune, but to lose both seems like carelessness!