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United in grief, but alone inside their own homes
The cemetery in Katuwapitiya: A reminder of the tragic loss of Easter Sunday last year. Pix by M.A. Pushpa Kumara
For the Catholic survivors of last year’s terrorist bombings, this year is doubly hard.
They couldn’t attend mass on Easter Sunday, the most important day of their religious calendar. And they cannot go to church on April 21 for the memorial service that had been planned for their loved ones.
It was meant to have been a celebration of their lives: the men, women and little children who died. But now, those left behind will be alone inside their homes, lighting candles and offering prayers when they had hoped to do it in solidarity with others who, like them, suffer the same grief.
The statue of the Risen Lord at St Sebastian's Church Katuwapitiya carrying the marks of last year's deadly attack now stands enshrined in a glass case
“It is natural that these families are feeling loneliness,” said Fr Jude Raj Fernando, Administrator of St Anthony’s Church, Kochchikade. “When it was Holy Week, they would have recalled to themselves what happened last year on Maundy Thursday, on Good Friday, at the Easter vigil and, then, on Easter Sunday.”
Fifty-four people died at Saint Anthony’s Church. Eight-three were injured. Every day, Fr Jude and his assistant celebrate mass by themselves, expose the Blessed Sacrament and recite the Rosary. They pray for the victims, and for justice.
Many people now feel deeply bereft, said Moses Akash de Silva, National Director of the Voice for the Voiceless Foundation that worked for many months with those affected by the bombings, mainly at Katuwapitiya in Negombo and Batticaloa.
“For around four to five months, there was much hype,” Akash said. A lot of people visited and so on. Time passed, and now there isn’t much attention. Some of them call me every day, just to say hello and to find out how I’m doing.”
St Sebastian's Church: There will be no one to fill these pews on April 21
One of them is a widower who lost his wife and daughter in the blast at St Sebastian’s in Katuwapitiya. He lives near the mass grave near the church were many of the dead were interred and which he visits often.
“They seem to need people to be around them, especially those who lost their family members,” Akash said.
One woman lost her daughter in the blast but could not attend the funeral as she was in the intensive care unit. “They invited us for a meal recently,” he recounted. “She told me that she still didn’t believe her daughter was dead because she didn’t see the burial. She felt she would still come back.”
This woman lost hearing in one ear. And her liver is damaged by shrapnel. She could no longer tend to the cattle that brought them an income. So Akash’s organisation bought the livestock from her and sold it to three families in Batticaloa who were also affected by the bomb at the Zion Church.
Her husband drove a three-wheeler but with the curfew, his income dropped drastically. They have been living off dry ration packs that were donated to them. Their other daughter survived because she bent down to tie a shoelace. She is sitting her GCE O/Levels this year.
Another woman, who lost several members of her family, rarely left the house even before the curfew. She has not been able to cope with the grief. The head of the household also died. He was an employer and 40 others who worked under him lost their jobs.
“There are three categories of people,” Akash said. “One is those directly affected by the bombings. The other is those who went to the churches and are partly affected. And the third are the indirectly affected.”
For instance, a family that lived opposite St Sebastian’s had a vegetable stall which did not have business after the bomb. They recovered somewhat, along with a donation from Voice for the Voiceless, but the curfew has hit them again, making them dependent on handouts.
For Christians, there is also a question of faith because the bombings happened in church. “We have been doing our level best to strengthen their faith experience,” Fr Jude said. “We have to understand their situation. It took them some time to come back to the church. They shared their experience of how they felt. Many were stronger than ever in their hope and have not given up.”
He spoke of a young couple who had been at the fateful mass. The woman was pregnant and was trampled in the panicked melee that took place after the bomb. For a full day, she felt no movement in her womb. But she delivered a healthy baby and brought it to church for a blessing. “This is a miracle child,” she told the priest.
“It’s nearly one year now,” said Fr Manjula Niroshan Fernando, the parish priest of St Sebastian. “Those who have taken a journey off faith have, not totally, but to a certain extent overcome the situation. Still, it’s not easy for them.”
That parish had the highest number of victims: 115 deaths. In five families, the children lost both parents. Of the injured, many have recovered from physical wounds. Around six are still paralysed. One remains in hospital.
“They have strived hard,” Fr Manjula said. “I am personally happy but there are times it hits them and they feel the loneliness. Those who have full trust in the Lord have overcome the situation particularly well because of their firm faith.”
A few days ago, he visited the woman who is still warded in hospital. She cannot move. “I asked her what she feels now,” he recounted. “Does she think there is no God and whether she blames the Lord.”
Silent sentinel: Kochchikade church in the glow of the night
“I also learned something from the answer she gave me,” he said. “She said, ‘No Father, what are you talking about?’ Those who see God outside may feel that, sometimes, He is not there. But those who feel God is within them, will not think so. I am alive. It is true I can’t move, but I am still alive. That is how God lives through me. I accept the situation’.”
This woman worked hard all her life to educate her children. Today, she is receiving help for it. Even if she is bedridden, she is happy her goals are being achieved.
As for loneliness, nobody else can take that away for them, Fr Manjula said. “Can anybody fill the void a family member leaves?” he asked. “But I think they will tell you they have gained many friends.”
The parish priest also said the new Government has promised to build 24 houses on a plot of land the church had bought for survivors who are still living on rent. The earlier administration had also pledged to do so but did not implement the plan before losing the election.
“We have not distributed the lands yet,” Fr Manjula said. “The Government asked us to give them some time.”
| Light a lamp or candle, says Cardinal Malcolm Ranjith | |
| Archbishop of Colombo Malcolm Cardinal Ranjith this week called on all Sri Lankans to commemorate the victims of the Easter Sunday bombings from home by lighting a lamp or candle in prayer.At 8.40 am, the bells of all Catholic churches will be rung in unison. The Cardinal urged all other religious places of worship to join in.At 8.45 am—when the first bomb was set off at St Anthony’s, Kochchikade—there will be two minutes of silence. There will be a televised programme at that time.The Cardinal then requested all citizens to light a candle or oil lamp at 8.47am and recite prayers. Elaborate ceremonies that had been scheduled to take places in the two affected churches have been cancelled because of the coronavirus pandemic. |