Thank you Mom
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To Mothers, we are eternally grateful
Yes, it’s commercialised, people take every opportunity to make a couple hundred bucks (rupees in Sri Lanka however). The world is a capitalistic monster, but a good one at times, and either we embrace it or refuse it, a personal choice. Mother’s Day however was not invented for commercial reasons, but through the mere sentiment of respecting women.
Here’s a snippet of the backstory: In its modern form the holiday originated in the United States, where it is observed on the second Sunday in May. Many other countries also celebrate the holiday on this date, while some mark the observance at other times of the year. During the Middle Ages the custom developed of allowing those who had moved away to visit their home parishes and their mothers on Laetare Sunday, the fourth Sunday of Lent. This became Mothering Sunday in Britain, where it continued into modern times, although it has largely been replaced by Mother’s Day. Mother’s Day is celebrated on Sunday, May 9, 2021.
Another story to the Day is brought about by this lady called Anna Jarvis in Philadelphia, whose mother had organised women’s groups to promote friendship and health, originated Mother’s Day. On May 12, 1907, she held a memorial service at her late mother’s church in Grafton, West Virginia. Within five years virtually every state was observing the day, and in 1914 U.S. Pres. Woodrow Wilson made it a national holiday.
Then there was the commercialization of the day and Jarvis tried her best to get rid of the day being a holiday and a whole effort of trying to stop capitalism but as we all know, that failed.
Anyway, having given a little bit of history, let’s look at the present and since everyone likes a good story, let me narrate few remarkable ones here, for all of our benefit.
The Homemaker
We call her Aunty D, I could tell her whole name but not too sure if she’d appreciate it. Now Aunty D, is an amazing homemaker. With the pandemic going on, all she thinks of is how she can support her husband and her children, by managing the home in the most efficient way. She bakes, cooks, gardens, cleans and helps her children do their homework, listens to all of their grumbling and sheds a tear when it’s unbearable.
The thing about Mrs. D is that, she’s the strong woman, any girl should aspire to be. Withstanding struggle after struggle, nonetheless pouring her heart out to keep her family moving forward.
The working mother
It’s not traditional for women to be working, people expect women to be home makers, good moms and caretakers. This paper written about “The Importance of Motherhood among Women in the Contemporary United States” authored by four university Professors in the US talks about various factors on how women entered the labour force in the 1970’s and then there was a shift in the social structure. That’s a good topic to discuss, on a different day. However, yes there has been a shift and even so mothers have continued to be the caretakers they’ve always been.
Mrs. Priya, a close friend of mine, passed away seven years ago, it was a tragic accident that took her life. She was a working mom, she had two children both of whom have grown up to be two beautiful young ladies.
While she lived, it was a constant struggle for her. People in general encounter challenges, man or woman, and being a mother adds to the pile of challenges a woman faces. Her work colleagues were not treating her well, her physical health was deteriorating, and while faced with managing the household and everything life has to throw at her, she probably was burdened with underlining mental health issues as well. Being a mother, sometimes tend to be overwhelming, they tend to take care of everyone else but themselves.
The family thrives, but moms often have their struggles but puts on their brave faces on, because that is what being a mother is.
The single Dad forced to be a mother
Life has several plot twists, and we don’t see any of them coming.
Mr. Janaka, was left with three kids to bring up when his wife left him. His whole world crashed, and he was left with no support system to lean on. Being a mother biologically helps women to have motherly instincts but when a man has to mother the children, that’s an entirely different ball game.
He was a disciplinarian, and a smart gentleman. He’d wake up the kids, prepare breakfast, dress them up, get them lunch, drop them off at school, pick them after school, go to parent teacher meetings, pick the kids after extra-curricular activities, help them with their homework, occasionally lose his temper but nonetheless bring up three wonderful kids up.
There were pitfalls along the way, no adult knows what they’re doing a 100%, we are all winging it, hoping it’s the best way to go about life. Bottom line being, Dads can make wonderful moms too.
Do we appreciate them enough?
As children, and mind you, all of us are children to our parents; we need to take a step back and evaluate our actions on a daily basis. Are we justified in how we talk to them, treat them or respect them? If that’s a yes, pat on your back, great job. If it’s a no, I hope you try and understand why, and even though you have your differences, take at least a day to put those differences aside and treat them well. There can be numerous reasons for how your relationships with your mother has been solidified.
Take this Mother’s Day and hopefully every year on from today to make her life a little better.
Here’s what you can do-
Go meet her
Sit down and talk to her about her day, how her life so far has been
Make amends, life is too short to hold grudges
Listen to her complain about how you could have done better in life (she probably enjoys getting on your nerves, love is weird I tell you) But hug her and thank her unlike the other days
Get her chocolate, share it with her
Clean her room (until she chases you out because you make a mess), but tell her why you wanted to and scream running “happy mothers day”
Cook her breakfast
Do the chores for the day (if possible share the chores every day, it’s not fun for someone to clean the house everyday)
Make her a card, tell her you love her
If you’re living apart, call her and tell her “I just called to say ‘I love you’”
Send her a postcard, she’ll get it next week
There’s plenty of ways to make a person feel loved, don’t let your dislike for capitalism and large romantic gestures stop you from showing the first woman who ever loved you that you love her in return. Man up, woman up, go celebrate those strong, beautiful mother’s in your life!
Written by
Devuni Goonewardene
(always open for feedback devuni@gmail.com)