Appreciations
View(s):My beloved Nangi who radiated so much love and joy
Nilmani Peiris
Our beloved Nangi, Nilmani more affectionately known to many as Nimmi, went to be with the Lord just over a month ago. Although we thought that time will reduce our grief, her loss has created a deep void in our lives and the sadness of her passing continues to live with us. I married Nimmi’s Loku Aiya who was ten years older than her. He was my cousin and so was she, which made us even closer. She was my friend, my sister and my confidante.
At the time I married, Nimmi was yet a schoolgirl, a slim, lithesome, tall, energetic sportswoman and also the Head Girl of her school. She was the apple of her parents’ eyes, as she was born after two boys – her beloved Loku Aiya and Punchi Aiya whom she adored. I must confess that as a young wife, I was mildly jealous of my husband’s deep affection for her, although soon enough I realized what a lovely adorable girl she was.
We became the greatest of friends sharing all our joys and sorrows, never letting any misunderstanding come in the way of our love for each other. To her I was a treasured Akka from whom she hid nothing. My love for her knew no bounds and I stood by her as she went through many misfortunes in life.
Nimmi spent 16 years of her life in the UK where she worked for British Airways. She came home regularly on short holidays to visit her family. Working for an airline gave her the opportunity to travel extensively, and many were the occasions on which she took her parents with her to visit different parts of the world which gave them great joy. She cared for them and planned every detail of the holiday perfectly, to make sure they would be comfortable and happy. She did everything possible for her parents to soften the blow, of the premature loss of their younger son.
Nimmi was an extremely hospitable person and while in the UK she enjoyed hosting and entertaining many visitors in her little home at Ruislip. Since her home was in close proximity to Heathrow, many friends, acquaintances and even friends of friends would come and stay with her. She was always happy to entertain them as best as she could. She had acquired great culinary skills and took delight in preparing delicious meals with a difference. We enjoyed her gourmet meals cooked with such meticulous care. Family meals in her home were much looked forward to.
While still in the UK she had many health issues which caused her constant physical pain and periods of hospitalisation. Although life was somewhat unfair to her, she had a firm Christian faith in a loving God who saw her through many trials and tribulations. She finally decided to give up her life in the UK and return home to take care of her aged parents, which she did with such tender loving care.
Once she returned home she immersed herself wholeheartedly in the activities of the Methodist church in Mount Lavinia. She took delight in helping with some of the projects of the church such as the Women’s Fellowship and the Young At Heart club. She was a hot favourite with the older ladies in the church, as she fussed over them and made them feel special. She adored children, particularly her nephews and nieces; all those who knew her were instantly drawn to her. She had a collection of toys in her house to give them whenever they visited her. She gave them so much genuine warmth and affection which was evident by the number of cards she received from many children on ‘Mother’s Day’.
Despite her ill health Nimmi had a great sense of humour and a cheerful bubbly disposition, always desirous of making others happy. She had a wide circle of friends and relations from school, church and her neighbourhood, all of whom she loved and were very special to her. They were a vital part of her life. She had the ability to laugh at herself and make everyone around her laugh as well.
Nimmi had a heart as large as her frame and was generous to a fault, often being taken for granted. She made sure that her left hand never knew what her right hand gave away. In fact it was after her passing away that we got to know of many of her loving deeds of generosity, where she had helped so many deserving and needy folk.
I cannot express in words how much I miss her. What I miss most is hearing her voice, as we used to call each other daily, and sometimes two or three times a day. There was so much to talk about and laugh about. That sweet voice has been stilled forever. There are times when I pick up the phone as I used to, to tell her something important and then realize with a pang in my heart that she is no more. The one consolation is that she would have reunited with her parents and brother, and that softens the sadness to some extent.
Our beloved Nimmi was indeed one unique person who will never be forgotten by those who knew her. Her devotion to her parents and family, the joy and happiness she radiated even in times of adversity and her great ability to make all those she associated with, feel so special are qualities that will keep her alive in our memories forever. May the Good Lord keep her safe in that mansion with many rooms till we meet again on that beautiful shore.
Manisha Peiris
She taught me the language of music
Susima Fernando
Twenty years ago, I met my new piano teacher, who became my forever friend.
At first, I called her Ms Fernando, but she thought that very stuffy and asked me to call her Susima. Our class was a mix of practice and theory with a tea break in the middle.
Some days the tea breaks became extended as Susima regaled me with stories from her childhood–of her home at Peiris Avenue in Dehiwala when the children were young, to her time in London, and then her life at Torrington Avenue. Running through all these stories was a warm and caring person. I was related to Susima through her husband, but her stories made me feel part of her family.
‘Did you practise, Manel?’ That was one question I didn’t look forward to, as nine times out of ten I had not, having been too busy. I kind of figured to myself that I played better without practice, but Susima was not convinced! She told me to practise as soon as I got home, which was excellent advice.
She was a teacher through and through and never was I able to get away with avoiding even one piece being played to a finish!
Susima was a really lovely person, friendly and outgoing; happy in herself and with herself. She had been the music teacher at Lindsay Balika Vidyalaya until her retirement. The Western School Band was initiated and set up by her. The teachers and the students were very close to her heart. There were many mementos from grateful students on the top of her piano reminding Susima of happy times at Lindsay.
Displayed on the piano were also photos of beloved pets, now gone. Her love for animals was universal. She would feed stray dogs whenever she got a chance, be it at Lindsay where she used to bring an extra share of lunch for the dogs and place the food in the Lindsay church belfry, or later at Independence Square, where she and her husband used to go for walks.
Susima loved her family deeply. The sudden loss of her son Chanaka in China was heart-breaking for her. It took her a very long time to come to terms with losing her ‘first born’, as she sadly referred to him. When Susima’s younger daughter, Amali and her family migrated to Australia she and herhusband, Major Gen. C. H. Fernando, went to visit. They had many Sri Lankan friends eagerly waiting to meet them.
Susima carried the concept of family to everyone she came across. One day on the Diyatalawa Road they had met young ‘Bala’ by the roadside. With the blessings of his parents, he and his two sisters came to Colombo to reside with Susima as house-helps.
She sent them to a government school close by and had them tutored as well. A good job was found for Bala and he was given in marriage from her home, where a bounteous feast was made ready by Susima and a few of her friends.
Old domestic aides used to flock to her, and she treated them all with kindness and generosity.
Susima performed every task with love and attention. One New Year’s Eve, she was busy sewing sequins on to the bodice of Suhashi’s lovely outfit until there wasn’t a fraction of the original material left to be seen. That was the night Suhashi won an air ticket to London which changed the direction of her life. Susima was a wonderful mother, absolutely committed to her children’s welfare.
A great cook, she delighted in making love cake, patties, different sweets and sweetmeats. She shared her recipes willingly. The wedding cakes for all her children’s weddings, and for her nieces and nephews weddings as well, were made by her. To bake a 4 lb love cake for each family birthday was her usual practice. One day when I went for a lesson she was busy compiling her favourite recipes into a book for her grandchildren.
At her funeral I noticed two photos taken on their Golden Wedding; informal, relaxed, happy photos of the couple and their retinue. In my mind’s eye, I will always see her as she was in the photo, the kind and caring person I was so fortunate to meet and get to know so well. That day I met Arjuna, Suhashi and Amali. Arjuna said, ‘You have lost your teacher.’ Amali said, ‘Teaching you gave her joy’. I was humbled.
When I look back at my time with Susima at her home at Torrington Avenue where I went to learn the piano, I see that what she taught me was a new language, the language of music.
Susima showed me a new world and I am so grateful
to her.
May she attain the bliss of Nibbana.
Manel Samarasinghe
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