5th Column

My dear Gota maamey,

I thought I must write to you again when I heard you saying in an interview that you “won’t go as a failed President”. Having heard that, many people are asking various questions. They wonder whether you really meant what you said and worry about what our plight would be if you do keep your word.

Initially though, I felt a sense of relief hearing that. That is because it meant that, finally, even at this stage, you have realised that you have indeed failed so far. So, no more ‘api thamai hondatama karey’ or ‘we did it best’ nonsense. Now it is, ‘api thamai hondatma fail wuney’ or ‘we failed the most’.

There is another reason I felt relieved when I saw that interview. That is because you had also said you won’t run again for the top job. The reaction of most people was to wonder whether you ever thought that you would be re-elected if you contested again.

I am not so sure though. Remember 2015? We sent Mahinda maama and Basil maama packing, accusing your family of nepotism, corruption, abuse of power and ignoring the rule of law. Less than five years later, the masses voted like assess to get all of you back, with a two-thirds majority, no less!

Gota maamey, though I was relieved to hear you say you won’t go despite all the shouting at ‘Gota Go Gama’ and the chanting of ‘Go home, Gota’ at Kheththarama, it also made me wonder whether you will stay on, like a student who repeatedly fails his ‘O’ Levels, hoping we will ‘pass’ you someday.

That is a worrying thought, because most of us feel that you will never ‘pass’. That is due to the mess you created in just two and a half years. Do you really think that you can turn this country around and bring us the ‘vistas of prosperity and splendour’ you promised, before your term ends in two years?

We are worried, not because it can’t be done, but because of how you have set about doing so. You have a Prime Minister who says every week that harder times are ahead. The same old lot who led you to ruin are in the Cabinet alongside some other opportunists who have defied their own parties.

However, if you are indeed interested in getting a ‘pass’ there are many actions that you can take, just as much as you reversed the ban on chemical fertiliser, decided to get the help of the IMF, dumped Cabraal and replaced him with Nandalal and asked Mahinda maama to resign. So, here are a few tips.

To show that you won’t stand for nepotism, removing all the ‘R’s from the Cabinet isn’t enough. How about proving that you place the nation’s interests above that of Basil maama’s by bringing a 21st Amendment that bars dual citizens being elected and ordering all the ‘pohottuwa’ MPs to vote for it?

When Sajith said he will form a government only if you gave a timeframe to abolish the Presidency, you said his offer was too late because you had already asked the Green Man to become PM. If that is true, Gota maamey, give us a timeframe to abolish the Presidency now and we might still ‘pass’ you.

You can also demonstrate that you stand for the rule of law. That means everyone is equal before the law. So, if you want us to ‘pass’ you, here are a few tasks that you can do easily: as the courts have ordered, get Mahinda maama to surrender his passport and put Deshabandhu and Johnny behind bars.

We all make mistakes and we can forgive you for the mistakes you have made if you are willing to learn from them. For starters, you could withdraw the pardon you granted young Duminda. That shouldn’t be too difficult, knowing that the courts are anyway going to review your decision soon.

Last but not the least, you would have heard that ‘Kappam’ Prasanna was given a prison sentence for abuse of power the other day. For us to ‘pass’ you, is it too much to ask you to sack him from his portfolio and as Chief Government Whip? Or, would you rather prefer to have a convict in that post?

You will realise, Gota maamey, that what has been asked of you has nothing to do with our economy, ending the queues for gas and fuel or the daily power cuts. All we need to see is that you have realised your decisions were wrong and that you are ready to change them. Then we can ‘pass’ you.

You can do this with the stroke of a pen or a telephone call.  If you are not willing to do so, you won’t get a ‘pass’ from the masses. Unfortunately, we feel that despite all that the ‘aragalaya’ has achieved, it is a still a government of the ‘Rs’, by the ‘Rs’ for the ‘R’s – with another ‘R’ joining you as PM!

On May 9, Mahinda maama had to leave, although he didn’t really want to. On June 9, Basil maama also left, although he too didn’t really want to. We know you too don’t really want to go home as a ‘failed leader’, but shouldn’t you be worrying about July 9 now, Gota maamey?

Yours truly,

Punchi Putha

PS: Two years ago, you showed poor judgment, asking a Dhammika with his ‘peni’ to try and counter the pandemic. The result was a disaster. Now, you are showing poor judgment again, asking another Dhammika with his money to counter today’s crisis. So, how can we ever pass you, Gota maamey?