28th May 2000

APC in heaven

"And," said JR, "they criticised me so much for getting down the Indians; they even called me a traitor"

"And now" RP agreed, "they are on their knees begging India to come back and they don't want to return"

"Naturally," GD said, "they lost over a thousand men and a Prime Minister" "But those days were different" SWRD protested. "How is that?" JR wanted to know.

"Why, when you called the Indians in, there were protests all over the country and public opinion was against it, unlike now"

"Now, there's no public opinion because the public doesn't know what's going on" LA argued.

"Why is that?" SWRD wanted to know. "Why," RP said, "they have this censorship"

"And we in the Land of No Return probably know what's going on in Paradise than those living in Paradise itself" GD said.

"That's quite remarkable isn't it, coming from someone who promised transparency in everything that she did" LA said.

"But" SWRD argued, "even JR had a censorship when he was there"

"Yes, yes" JR agreed, "but I never sealed any major newspapers in my time though I did many other things"

"That's true" RP said, "even I didn't do that"

"Yes," said GD, "it looks like sealing newspapers is becoming a family tradition; like mother, like daughter!"

"But I didn't seal any newspapers during my time; so it is not a family tradition" SWRD protested.

"But SWRD," JR pointed out, "You-know-who is not doing any of the things that you did"

"Why do you say that?" SWRD demanded.

"Why, you created Sinhala-only; You-know-who is trying hard to reverse that.

You nationalised everything; You-know-who is privatising everything" GD pointed out.

"In fact," LA said, "I think You-know-who is doing everything that we greens did and perhaps even a bit more than that"

"I agree with that" RP said.

"You-know-who is not doing any of the things that you did" SWRD protested.

"Ah, why not?" RP asked. "Remember, I tried to talk with the Tigers and everyone called me a traitor at that time? Now You-know-who is trying to get Norway to get the Tigers to a negotiating table, though no one is calling You-know-who a traitor for that"

"Who knows, they may be calling her a traitor" GD suggested, "but no one knows about it because of the censorship"

"Thinking about what You-know-who has done" JR said, "at least I can be happy"

"Why is that?" LA wanted to know.

"At least someone has learnt something from me, though my nephew hasn't" JR said.

"Why do you say that?" SWRD asked.

"Why, look at what You-know-who has done- keeping the Executive Presidency, imposing censorship and emergency regulations, inviting the Indians, even resuming relations with Israel. My good work is being continued" JR boasted.

"And of course," LA pointed out, "that includes losing the war too"

"There's something that JR did that You-know-who hasn't done yet" GD pointed out.

"And what's that?" RP wanted to know.

"Postpone the general elections, after winning a second term of office and having a referendum instead" GD said.

"Don't you worry" JR said. "You-know-who will follow me to the letter on that one too"

SWRD thought it was too risky to say anything to that.

The Jungle Telegraph

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