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Those were the
days… "Life
back then was truly beautiful. We enjoyed the simple things and
were satisfied with small mercies."
Ever
been told this before? Better
yet, comments such as these are generally backed by, "When
we were your age, we never spoke back to our parents the way you
do or went out the way you do, or even dressed the way you do. Now
everything lacks discipline, respect and ethics." Words of any
member from that wise old era, we believe. Yes, we are talking about
grandmothers! It was once said that "Grandmothers are like
snowflakes; no two are alike!" Talking to
some grandmothers, we discovered women who had the courage of their
convictions. Yes, times were different, society was stricter, but
they had wonderful times and enjoyed life, just the way young people
of the present generation do. The Golden
Lady of Cinema, Iranganie Serasinghe has done it all. "I was
always a rebel," she says, smilingly, summing up her life.
Born in 1927 in a village off Ruwanwella, her family consisted of
her parents, two sisters, a brother and herself. "My parents
were quite broadminded for those times. They weren't exceptionally
strict, but we never openly defied them." School life
was extremely blissful. She first studied at St. Bridget's Convent
and lived with her aunt, whose home was next door to the school.
But she soon moved to Bishop's College and stayed on until the S.S.C.
standard. "Since I was boarded at the College hostel for so
many years, I wanted a change and so after my S.S.C. exam which
is the equivalent of the Ordinary Level Examination of today, I
informed my teachers that I wouldn't be coming back. Little did
they know that I had other plans!" says Iranganie, her eyes
lighting up. School in those
days, she says, was not as crowded as it is now, the classrooms
were more spacious and her teachers absolutely wonderful. "I
wouldn't be what I am today, if not for my teachers," she said.
Back then,
girls were not expected to pursue higher education, particularly
Kandyans like herself. But determined to do so, she joined Girls
High School, Kandy and sat for her H.S.C. exam, and qualified for
University entrance. "Though
my father himself had read Classics at the University of Cambridge,
the fact that his daughter wanted to enter University was utterly
unacceptable to him. But after much begging, pleading and even 'hunger
strikes' during which I ate of course, and after the 'elders' of
the family spoke to my father, he was finally convinced. I joined
the Arts Faculty of the Colombo University and studied English,
Economics and History," she said nostalgically. Moving on to
romance and marriage, Mrs. Serasinghe agreed that the norm those
days was undoubtedly arranged marriages. "But here again, I
was rebellious. When I found the right person, I walked up to my
father and told him so. He looked at me and said, "I always
knew that you'll come and tell me this". So obviously, her
parents had conditioned their minds to the ways of this rebel of
a daughter! As for the
obvious question on how this brilliant actress found her way in
to the field… According to her, it was definitely not pre-planned.
Though she performed in school plays, her first public performance
was in Pygmalion, while at Girls High School, Kandy. While at University
she was dragged by some of her friends for an audition of plays,
usually French translations. It was no looking back from then on.
Adding another to her list of rebellious doings, Mrs. Serasinghe
proudly proclaimed that she had taken to Kandyan dancing, once again
defying traditions. "Kandyan
Dancing was an art form exclusively for men and in those days it
was only members of a particular caste who did it. So a girl taking
to it was just unacceptable. But I continued dancing classes under
Chitrasena and no one said anything after a while." "Yes,
films generally reflect the changes that are taking place in society
today," she said, replying to a question posed. "And now
we have a talented younger generation of film directors who are
quite bold in their perspectives and as a result, they are doing
a good job for the industry. Most tele-dramas of today, though concentrating
mainly on the family unit, are showing the true picture," she
added. Finally for
a comparison of then and now, from one of the most distinguished
members of that golden era: "We had time for everything, the
pace of life was much slower, and there were so many unwritten laws
which we obeyed. We learnt about things such as not sneaking on
people, not cheating and learning to lose gracefully. But now there
is a huge breakdown in ethics. Money has to play a part in everything." Speaking to
Indrani H. Guneratne, we realised that she did things, which were
thought unthinkable for women in that era. "Studying
at Ladies' College, and then Arts at the University, I went on to
join Radio Ceylon and later on the Rupavahini Corporation."
Holding the posts of Director of Educational Services and Director
General of Educational Programmes respectively, she was a pioneer
in a field that most other women dared not enter. Keeping to
the norms of that era, she along with her sisters agreed to arranged
marriages. "We just accepted the fact that our parents knew
what was best for us and didn't question them. But I married at
28, having done all what I wanted to do with my life." However, Mrs.
Angelica Halahackone, 85, had a different story to tell us. She
had also been in a hostel and according to her, "Hostel life
was fine!" Were the nuns strict? we asked. "No, they were
very nice. They were Irish and English nuns." But school life
was comparatively short, as she got married when she was 17. "I loved
to play the piano. I was very good at it, and I even won a number
of competitions. Yes, I continued to play the piano even after I
got married, and I loved to sing." But the highlight
of her life had been the time she was involved in horse racing.
"My husband Henry Halahackone was the owner of many race horses.
We owned a champion horse called Surety 11. He came first in all
the horse racing championships and I was the one who went up onto
the stage to collect the cups. I managed to collect four for my
four children. I was once even awarded a cup by Sir Oliver Gunathilake."
"The jockeys
were European," explained Angelica. "It was very nice
watching them ride. It was so interesting that I got my husband
to teach me also. We owned a hack and it was so much fun learning
to ride." "It would
be quite safe to say that I mastered it in the end," added
Angelica who had proved to be quite a good horse rider during her
youth. "I loved it back then… Everything was so simple,
yet nice." Born in the
early 1920s, journalist, well-known counsellor and everyone's favourite
agony aunt, Mrs. Anne Abayasekara was the only daughter in a family
of two, which was unusually small, for that era. "My parents
were not exceptionally strict, but we were generally quite obedient.
Having a brother was an advantage, as in those days, a girl couldn't
go anywhere without a chaperone," she added laughing. "Yes,
boys in those days were absolutely taboo. But thanks to my brother,
I had the chance of mingling with a few!" School was
the most glorious time ever spent, she added. "I studied at
Ladies' College and I can safely say that it was the best period
of all times." Anne grew up
in the hostel from the age of seven to 10. "Having been in
a private hostel before, I loved the school boarding with boon companions,"
she was quick to add. "It was
run on English lines… every morning, even 'we' in the baby
dorm had to turn our mattresses to air, hang-up our night clothes,
see that the clothes in our lockers were neatly arranged. Make sure
that there were no stray hairs on our hair-brushes after use, shower
in the time allotted for each of us, and make our beds as neatly
as possible - beds were made up in hospital style, with a sheet
folded halfway and the sides tucked in. "On the
first day I was surprised to find that dinner consisted of a soup,
followed by a course of fish or meat with bread and a pudding for
dessert," continued Anne. "Table manners had to be well
observed!" "After
dinner, we said our evening prayers in which was known as the Big
Kindergarten Room, generally taken by Miss Opie, the Principal.
Then we would hurry to our dormitories, where again we would get
into nighties and kimonos - the house coat was unheard of then!"
she added with a laugh. "And then
we would organise a concert in the time that was left before 'lights
out'. We loved to put on makeshift costumes and props!" Moving on to
marriage, "I got married just after my twentieth birthday.
His name was Earle Abayasekara and he worked at Lake House. Actually,
it was he who gave me my first letter of appointment!" "I started
working just a few months before my 18th birthday. I started 'downstairs'
at Lake House, and finally I was called to work for the editorial
in 1947. I was the only woman working there…until Seetha Parakrama
joined in 1948." "We had
loads of fun!" Anne exclaims. "Ships used to call in regularly
and we used to get passenger lists and somehow managed to get an
interview if there was someone interesting in the ship." "Other
events I wrote about which I can remember very well were the Robert's
Cup and the Governor General's Cup. I was asked to cover the fashions.
I remember Yvonne Gulamhusein coming in a slinky outfit which was
amazing and Frances Smith coming in a crinoline frock complete with
a parasol and frills. They were so different from each other and
here I was, not knowing a thing about fashion, and having to write
about how beautiful they looked! It was a very arduous task, I admit,"
reminisced a laughing Anne. "Life
back then was different…it was less complicated and pressured
then and we had lots of family fun by way of picnics, singsongs,
romping on the beach, going to the zoo and family holidays,"
she continues. "It was a source of rich joy, nonetheless!"
All the ladies
we spoke to had done what they wanted to with their lives, in different
ways nonetheless. They also had danced, sung songs and had fun…
and come to think of it, that's what we still do today! Though we tend to think that they belong to the days of yesterday, and have little in common with the modern generation, we realised that it was a grand old era. But the people were not very different in their dreams and aspirations. Changing
values Society is
still not equal. The number of poor people in Sri Lanka is still
horrifying. Those days, the poor were under the landlords and now
they are under the politicians who make maximum use of them but
never do anything in return. We should change our attitudes, help
the underprivileged come up in life, instead of selfishly focussing
only on ourselves. "Those
days, when we bathed in a river, we made sure we left the place
clean, so that anyone else could come and bathe in it. But now,
people aren't bothered! They will pollute
the place and as they have had their bath, will go away, not caring
about the others," said one person we spoke to. "The general
attitude of the people now, is that as long as I am okay, to hell
with the others." Another grandmum
had this to say. "This world is full of violence and sadness.
Why?" When we were young, life was full of picnics and singsongs,
but now that is not so. There are so many people killed every other
day and we see so much of unhappiness around us all the time. We
should make the world a safer place for the little children all
over again - they should be able to be as free as we were when we
were small and growing up. "Young
children of today have no respect for their parents. They talk back
to them and do not listen to a word they say. We would never dare
talk back. We respected them, and listened to them. Always."
"Respect them," were the words of advice given to us by
another grandmother. "The youth
of today spend so much money on material comforts. They forget about
the people on the roads, and how much so many people suffer in today's
world," continued another grandmother. "Change your attitude.
Be selfless!" But something they asked us to keep in mind is to believe in what we do. "Never give up. If you want to do something, just do it! There will be so many people out there, who will try to discourage you, but if you are certain you want to do it… Just go ahead. Do it!" |
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Copyright © 2001 Wijeya Newspapers
Ltd. All rights reserved. |
