POLITICAL SKETCHBOOK

POLITICAL SKETCHBOOK by Rajpal Abeynayaka

Life and lessons in these conference days
Failure and success the two impostors were doing overtime last week. One was at the PA press conference. Which one he was - failure or success - there are no prizes for guessing.

But enough to say that Lakshman Kadirgamar was saying that he hasn't glanced at an English dictionary for ages. "After a long long time I referred one this week'' -- he said, his voice rising to a high register, "to make sure of the meaning of the word 'plenary'.''

While he was at it he might have looked up the word hubris. The hubris went down a notch when he was asked whether it is possible the opposition waited until Ranil Wickremesinghe was out of the country to launch their putsch. "Didn't the opposition have the guts to do it while he was in the country?'' he was asked.

There was no country-roads-take-me-home answer for that one. It was just a one sentence comeback. "No it had nothing to do with his being out of the country -- next question.'' Tune into Temple Trees.

The press conference there is as dreary as the weather that day. Ten Ministers line up along the auditorium wall, all looking as if they were from the undertakers association at the wake of Mr Sourberry. And Mr Choksy could well have been able to go before that mirror and ask 'so, who is the sourest of them all?''

Out of the ten Ministers lined up against the wall a very few spoke and when they did, it was as if to say please put us out of our misery -- particularly when they all kept saying that "whatever that's being done will be within the constitutional process.''

Earlier in the week, it has been another press conference in Kilinochchi, with Thamilselvan doing the honours. That of course was before the drama had properly begun, and Mr Hubris and Mr Sourberry had all come on the stage. Now they can all get together and celebrate the land of expressive press conferences.

What if it was mandated that expressions and sentiments at press conferences were required by law to be synched, to match perfectly? Would Mr Kadirgamar look up the word sovereignty in the dictionary? Probably he would be looking for other ways to say "I am so pleased we are back on the road to power, that the Shorter Oxford would have to invent a whole new word for that condition.'' As for putting on a brave front, the UNF ten had neither the braves nor the front. Ranil Wickremesinghe, pummelled by jet lag, managed to put on a braver front.

Something happened to Ranil on his way to Colombo. He almost lost his job, and on his return he sees all those faces have changed. Bubbly faces look forlorn. Drawn faces of two weeks ago now look glowing -- and miraculously, they beam from State television or photographs in Lake House papers.

This is not the bookish time Ranil's father was at Lake House either. Now, the Lake House has something hallowed about it, like the sacred scripts. It workings are an eloquent testament to the impermanence of all things.

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