Watch
those gestures
By Aditha Dissanayake
Are you a man with a large nose? Are you a woman with long hair?
If so, take note. Your nose or your hair can reveal much about you.
If you are a man with a large nose, this means you are physically
strong. If you are a woman with long hair you are supposed to be
open and passionate. Says who? Hedwig Lewis in his book 'Body Language'.
Beware.
Your nose grows big when you lie! The next time you lie make sure
you keep your hand away from your nose, because your nose will give
you away. According to Lewis, your sense of guilt occasioned by
lying gives rise to stress which in turn sends blood to the erectile
tissue in the nose. The increase in size is not visible from the
outside, but you may give yourself away at this stage by rubbing
your nose in response to the irritation caused by the blood engorged
tissue. Italian writer Carlo Collidi's Pinocchio with his large
nose could not have been entirely fictitious.
Your
hands, your posture or even your eyebrows can convey much about
you. When you have your arms crossed in front of you, you show you
are aloof, when you shrug your shoulders you convey you are indifferent.
And, what you do with your fingers while speaking is directly related
to what is in your mind. When you are being untruthful you might
rub your neck with your finger and pull at your collar when you
are detected.
Different
cultures too have different physical languages, which however, convey
different messages. To quote D. Walton from 'Are you communicating?'
Weaving or calling someone with a finger are considered insults
in Greece and the Middle East. When a Brazilian taps his head he
is indicating he is going through a thinking process, but elsewhere
in the world the same gesture stands for "crazy". The
British hiss when they show disapproval; in Japan hissing is an
expression that shows social respect.
Be
careful when you next make eye contact with someone, for it has
been observed that in a given interaction a person looks at the
other between 30 and 60 percent of the time, and so, if you exceed
this range your listener might think you are more interested in
him than in what you are telling each other. If you gaze at someone
for more than two seconds (which is the normal time span for a gaze)
you would either be indicating that you are head-over-heels in love
with the person in front of you or that you see him or her as one
of your staunch enemies. In normal eye contact on the other hand,
after the first two seconds either one or both viewers should experience
a powerful urge to glance away.
Yet,
there are times when it is important to "give him the eye".
For, if you avoid eye contact you might give the impression that
you are not interested, ashamed, embarrassed or evasive. A direct
glance on the other hand, could show that you are interested, honest
and friendly.
Looking
at a person directly in the eyes to grab his or her attention contrasts
with the sidelong glance called the stolen look. This is when you
look sideways furtively rather than directly, so as not to be caught
in the act. You keep on looking so far as the object of your gaze
is not aware of being observed. However the moment you are detected
and the eyes of both meet, you immediately let your gaze slide away.
It takes two to steal sidelong glances!
Finally
here is a riddle about a gesture which should be made by everyone
whenever possible.
"It
costs nothing but gives much. It enriches those who receive, without
making poorer those who give. It takes but a moment, but the memory
of it lasts forever. It cannot be bought, begged, borrowed, or stolen,
for it is something that is of no value to anyone until it is given
away. Some people are too tired to give it to you. But give them
one of yours, as none needs it so much as he who has no more to
give."
Guessed
the answer yet? Raise the corners of your lips. You are doing it.
If you want the world to be nice to you, keep your lips that way,
forever. |