5th Column

What she did and did not do?
My Dear Satellite,
I thought I must write to you when I saw all these congratulatory messages in the state media which said it was your tenth anniversary in office. Why, Satellite, it seems only yesterday that you were just an innocent little girl in politics on whom a nation pinned its hopes on.

You are a decade older now and a good deal wiser I daresay but I am not quite sure whether the country still believes you could deliver the goods politically and economically. But I must give credit where credit is due and though you get may be much out of ten for performance, you score a full ten for acting because your always play a very convincing role.

Why Satellite, just the other day you summoned the top brass of the police and then kept them waiting for a full two hours and made them watch a movie. We know the film industry is in a crisis but no one but you could think of such an ingenious way to solve the problem!

Then, you turn up and with quite a straight face claim angrily that the police and the judiciary are corrupt. Politicians in your party are not, you say and it took the good priest from Bellanvila to ask you about those who go about bashing nightclubs with their goon squads.

Not to be outdone, you smile your charming smile and say that yes there is but one rogue in this pack of bodhistavas and assure everyone that he will be dealt with. That man Mervyn did resign the next day but I am sure quite a few went home that day thinking that politicians are such a nice lot and that the police and the judiciary are the root of all evil in this country!

But with ten years gone and one (or is it two?) to go, it is always good to reflect on what has been done and more importantly what has not. Someone once said that the measure of a good leader is whether he leaves the country in a better shape than when he inherited it.

In terms of the economy, I think any housewife will tell you the answer to that. We are not at war anymore but the credit for that should go more to the Green Man than to you, even though we do not doubt your good intentions on this matter. But the country does enjoy more political freedom, as your good friends the Rathu sahodarayas will tell you.

But Satellite, with only a few months left you have a lot left to do: you have to change the Constitution and somehow move in to the next Parliament. You've got to pass the baton to young Anura to prevent that pest Mahinda taking the hot seat. You've got to kick the Rathu sahodarayas out of the Alliance and make the Blues stand on their own feet again. And if there is still some left, you can also think about settling the ethnic issue. So, best of luck for the remaining few months…

Yours truly,
Punchi Putha
PS- After your good mother lost, many people remembered her not for being the first lady to hold the job in the world but for the queues, the rice barriers and having to eat manioc on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Judging by the way our economy is performing now some people may be lucky to have anything to eat on Tuesdays and Thursdays and you don't want to be remembered for that, would you?

Back to Columns