5th Column

Promises taking us to land of milk, money and a big moo
"Thaaththa," Bindu Udagedera said, "I am sure we are in for a good time…"
"Why do you say that, Bindu?" Percy, Bindu's father wanted to know.
"Why, thaaththa, the elections are just around the corner…"
"But I thought elections are a time of fighting with each other and curfews and violence…" Percy said.

"That may be so, thaaththa," Bindu said, "but I am thinking of what will happen after the election…"
"It is after the election that the curfews and violence usually starts, Bindu…" Percy recalled.

"No, thaaththa," Bindu said, "I am talking of the peaceful and prosperous country that we will all be living in after the elections…"
"Why, who do you think will win?" Percy wanted to know.

"I don't know about that, thaaththa…" Bindu said.
"Then, how can you say that the country will suddenly become peaceful and prosperous?" Percy demanded.

"It doesn't matter who wins, thaaththa…" Bindu said, "it can be Mahinda Maama, Ranil Uncle or who knows, even Victor Seeya…"
"But what makes you think the country will become a paradise overnight?" Percy was puzzled.

"Why, thaaththa, what about all those promises…"
"Ah, promises…" Percy said, "those are just an essential tool for any politician…"

"But thaaththa, the candidates are swearing that they honour all their promises…" Bindu argued.
"Like what, for instance?" Percy wanted to know.

"Well, Ranil Uncle says he will give everyone two salaries in December if he wins…" Bindu pointed out, "so just imagine what you could do with an extra pay packet…"

"I thought there wasn't even enough money to pay the already approved pay hikes which is why someone or the other is always on strike…"
"Don't worry about that…" Bindu said, "Ranil Uncle says he is 'kiyana they karana, karana they kiyana…"

"What about Mahinda Maama?" Percy asked, "what is he promising?"
"Why he says that if he is elected, he will ask Prabhakaran to come for talks, finish the talks within a given time period and then get him to agree to a united Sri Lanka…"

"Do you think that is as easy as it sounds?" Percy asked.
"The way Mahinda Maama says, it sounds pretty easy…" Bindu said, "and I am sure he can do it because he says he will personally meet Prabhakaran and get him to agree…"

"So," Percy asked, "as a child going to school, what will you get from the election?"
"Why, thaaththa, as far as we are concerned, we don't care who wins the election because we will be really well off…"

"Why do you say that?"
"Why, thaaththa, if Uncle Ranil wins he will give us a free glass of milk and if Mahinda Maama wins he will give two hundred rupees every month for milk food but I would really like Victor Seeya to win…"
"Why is that?" Percy was surprised.

"Why, thaaththa, if he wins there won't be any hassle with free glasses of milk or two hundred rupees because every family will get a cow…"
"Ah," Percy said, "now that is one promise that he can keep without any difficulty…"

"Why do you say that, thaaththa?" Bindu asked.
"Why, Bindu, if Victor Seeya really wins that would mean there is already one cow or more in every family. He wouldn't need to find any more…"
Bindu didn't quite feel like saying 'moo' to that.

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