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TIMES POSTCARD
Sri Lankan -- the record setter airline
By Rajpal Abeynayake
In future before you fly Sri Lankan Airlines, the first step should be to buy your ticket. The second step however is not to pack your luggage.
The second is to check Chandrika Kumaratunga’s travel itinerary up close.
She is a private citizen. But Sri Lankan Airlines flies these days according to her whims and her fancies -- and therefore if you have a ticket you can fly --- Chandrika willing.

We have to ask what Sri Lankan Airlines thinks about competition.
Cathay Pacific never gets late, for instance.
Let us ask the CEO of Sri Lankan Airlines what he thinks about the fact that Cathay Pacific and Singapore airlines never or almost never get late.
Perhaps the CEO might say “ah we do not know much about competition, but we think it’s chic to wait for a lady who is late.’’

Sri Lankan will have advertisements in future that scream – “we wait for a lady.’’ “Even ten hours.’’ They might add…”and she is just a lady….what do you think, we should wait only for presidents.’’

As far as Chandrika Kumaratunga is concerned, she was on a private visit to Australia as a private citizen. She made one call to Sri Lankan Airlines, and not only did they keep the airline waiting, they also made an announcement.
They might have added to the passengers “you yokels, we do not care a whit whether you get late or if you want you fly our competition Singapore airlines or Cathay Pacific -- and as if we give a damn what you do with your custom anyway. Take your business with us and shove it, please’’

Why did Sri Lankan Airlines do it, I mean keep the airline waiting for a private citizen?? Was it a mark of respect for the ex first citizen? In which case, Sri Lankan would have had many alternatives, such as re-routing her on the next available airline, Cathay Pacific or whatever, and the cost to be footed by Sri Lankan Airlines.

Instead of which Sri Lankan Airlines keeps the airline waiting, and earns the reputation for being the only airline in the world which does not care that the passengers have to be held up because of one private citizen. Not just that, it’s thick about it too and makes an announcement.

If this is Sri Lankan airlines policy, we expect the following kinds of advertisements from Sri Lankan airlines in the future:

* Fly us – we will keep the plane waiting, and you can watch us get into the Guinness Book of records as the only airline that commits entrepreneurial suicide

*Fly us – we respect no one, certainly not our passengers, except our ex first citizen

*Fly us - - when our ex first citizen calls, we get up from our chairs to answer the phone, and our CEO, he gets so nervous, its as if he is on the toilet seat with hemorrhoids. Oops, is that gross. But we are gross. We do not give a damn about punctuality, your connecting flights and your other requirements. We are gross - - tra la la, gross and late, so wot? (Fade to serenade.)

* We are the only airline so badly concerned about the well being of our competition that we are determined to lose our passengers. Isn’t this cute. Yes, we are so gross and so cute at the same time. We are like Chandrika Bandaranaike Kumaratunge to be exact. We do everything these days to undermine our own image, without any help from others.

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