Appreciations

It’s almost one year since my father passed away leaving a void that cannot be filled easily. He left us in the manner he lived, quietly and peacefully without any bother on the morning of 17th February 2007.Going on his 91st year he was gradually losing his strength but his spirit remained strong. He was blessed with good health except for a knee ailment that curtailed his mobility in the last few years of his life. That particular morning he seemed somewhat unwell but was falling asleep when we called in the doctor, who had attended to him in the past few years. I could not believe my eyes how he left this world, while the doctor was still attending to him, leaving me in a state of confusion for some time.

My father popularly known as Dudley was a southerner but grew up in Kandy as his father was in public service. He was the eldest in a family of three brothers and four sisters. He commenced his schooling at Trinity and spent the last few years at St Joseph’s where he passed his London Matriculation, but sports was his forte. He was proud of being an old Trinitian and maintained a strong affection for his alma mater throughout his life. He was a swimmer, weight lifter and athlete. He was strong, big built and had an amazing stamina that made him walk miles without a worry. Having lost his father at an early stage he shouldered the family responsibilities with dedication and so he had a large following from his nephews and nieces who adored him so much.

Ours was a close knit family and to him nothing was more important than caring for my needs as well as my mother’s. He was a force behind my mother who dedicated a major part of her life to her old school Visakha and in religious activities, often spending long hours at the school, in which he too played a major part. My mother’s caring devotion for him which was much appreciated was the hallmark of their long happy partnership. As for me he was my companion from kindergarten to Law College and thereafter even in my initial years of professional career, driving me in this circle was a ritual he practised with utmost dedication. He was a quiet man of few words but could be firm whenever the occasion demanded. To him home was the most important place and after returning from office he hardly left the house except on family outings with us.

Apart from his role as husband and father he was also a dutiful Grandpa to my daughter to whom “Seeya” was more a playmate in her growing up years .My father was a good Ballroom dancer and possessed a good voice. Even during his last few years he did not rest his vocal chords and came out with his singing talents. He celebrated his 88th birthday amidst a large circle of neighbours and relations keeping everyone in laughter.

His whole working career was spent at one institution, United Tractors where he continued working till 74 as a Senior Accountant and requested to be released much against the wishes of his superiors who loved and respected him so much. His agile mind, sharp mathematical skills, commitment and integrity was much appreciated by his superiors. My father’s mathematical prowess was put to good use during an era sans computers, or even calculators. Next to home his other priority was office which he served with absolute dedication and pride. His loyalty to the Company was such that the Company never forgot him and there were many faithful colleagues from all ranks who came to pay their last respects.

As practising Buddhists we are well aware of the impermanency of life but to this day I cannot believe that my father is not living as his gentle voice, firm advice and imposing figure still haunts me. He did his duty to the utmost and made us comfortable in every way. His wants in life were very few but he gave a helping hand to many. In a country so politicized it did not matter to him who governed but he did whatever he could do for others, in his quiet way. Though not in extremes, he lived according to Lord Buddha’s preaching with the least of wants and attachments. It is my sincere hope that his sansaric journey be shortened and he attains the cherished goal of supreme bliss of Nirvana.

He was everything you could hope for in a father