5th Column

My dear Uncle Ranil,

I am writing to you to congratulate you on your almost unbelievable return to power – and that too to the most powerful position in the country. You have your critics, enemies, and those who really dislike you, but I think even they will concede that you get full marks for sheer determination and resilience.

Previously, I addressed you as the ‘Green Man’. I can’t do so any more. That is because you won the top job with mostly maroon votes. You also asked us not to call you ‘His Excellency’. Ranil maama doesn’t sound right and ‘Mr President’ sounds too formal, so I thought I will call you ‘Uncle Ranil’.

What was ironic about that contest last Wednesday was that the ‘pohottuwa’ chaps proposed someone from the Green Party and those formerly from the Green Party proposed Dullas from the ‘pohottuwa’. To add to that, proposing your name was Dinesh, your classmate at Royal from 65 years ago!

Almost two years ago, Uncle Ranil, you and the Green Party were defeated by the people. They were angry that you squandered a golden opportunity to establish good governance. Instead, the big bank was robbed, rogues from both sides were protected, and the Easter attacks were allowed to happen.

You found yourself out of Parliament for the first time in 43 years. The Green Party was annihilated and had just the solitary seat. People rushed to write your political obituary. Even those writing fiction wouldn’t have dared to suggest that you will be ‘Mr President’ in less than two years.

The rest is history. Some will say you just got lucky because you were in the right place – the Prime Ministerial chair – at the right time. Others will still argue that you don’t have a real mandate because you couldn’t win at the polls and came to Parliament through the ‘back door’, the National List.

That is true, but it is also true that you accepted the PM’s job when no one wanted it. Fortune does favour the brave. You may be lucky now, but there were plenty of times when you were unlucky – such as when Mahinda maama pipped you to the post in 2005 by a boycott engineered through the Tigers.

How you got the top job is also interesting. We expected a close contest between you and Dullas, especially after Sajith withdrew, but in the end, your margin of victory was massive. Obviously, some of those ‘telephone’ chaps defied Sajith and voted for you. Sajith still has a lot to learn, hasn’t he?

It was amusing to hear what your good friend Mahinda maama said after the contest. He claimed the ‘pohottuwa’ voted for Dullas. He is insulting our intelligence if he thinks we believe him because, if they all voted for Dullas and he still lost, there must have been some ‘jilmart’ in the counting!

You showed that you neither forgive or forget. GL was sacked from Foreign Affairs for the crime of proposing Dullas to contest you. Even so, we held our noses watching the rest of Gota maama’s Cabinet being sworn in again. So, all the ‘aragalaya’ did was to replace Gota maama with you!

More importantly, what will you do next? We face our greatest crisis as an independent nation and rightly or wrongly, you were chosen to fix it. You are an ‘Accidental President’, but people expect you to turn this nation around quickly and those in the ‘aragalaya’ are asking some questions.

Will you, for instance, enact the 19th Amendment which you were so keen about when you were PM? If you do so, that will drastically reduce your own powers and transfer them to your PM. After having waited for this job for almost 30 years and finally getting it, will you let go of all its powers now?

A major reason why you lost the last election was because you didn’t punish wrongdoers in the ‘R’ camp when you had the chance, treating them with kid gloves instead. Those at the ‘aragalaya’ and many of us want that to happen. Can you do so, when your support in Parliament comes from them?

We know that the ‘pohottuwa’ chaps can hardly return to their villages now, they are so unpopular. The last thing they want is a general election. The first thing many of those at the ‘aragalaya’ and many other parties want is also a general election. So, are you prepared to dissolve Parliament, Uncle Ranil?

What about your job itself? After Gota maama’s shenanigans, and with each President being worse than their predecessor – with the exception of DB – there has been a growing demand to get rid of the Executive Presidency. Can you keep a straight face and tell us that you agree with this idea?

We hear that you are trying to rope in some ‘telephone’ chaps to the Green camp and that Harin is the ‘broker’. Knowing you, I am sure you are not looking at the next two and half years. Instead, you must be thinking of how to win the next elections and stay for the following five years too!

Uncle Ranil, you are where you are today only because Mahinda maama was caught inciting the public, Gota maama was run out of President’s House, Sajith got out to a ‘no ball’ – when he didn’t take the chance that was offered to him – and Anura sahodaraya was stumped by the lack of numbers.

There was a time some time ago when we knew you as ‘Mr Clean’. After the Central Bank scam, the Easter fiasco and the ‘yahapalanaya’ circus, you became ‘Mr Bean’. Now, we want you to be ‘Mr Keen’ to resurrect the nation. The events at Galle Face on Friday told us you could be ‘Mr Mean’ too.

After Friday’s events some are already asking ‘den sepada’? Everyone marvels at your ability to return from nowhere, but this is your last chance to redeem yourself. Uncle Ranil, the crown you wear is a crown of thorns. If you want history to be kind to you, you mustn’t let recent history repeat itself.

Yours truly,

Punchi Putha

PS- Spare a thought for Anura sahodaraya. Whatever his faults, he fights the good fight and puts his name up whenever there is a contest. Unfortunately for him, this time he went from being “seeyata thunai” or three percent to “desiya visi pahatama thunai” or three from two-hundred and twenty-five!