5th Column

My Dear Uncle Ranil,

I thought I should write to you again today because it is exactly a month ago that you assumed office as the big boss of our troubled Paradise. For some reason, that day, July 21, has been an auspicious day for you. That was also the day you were first elected to Parliament 45 years ago.

You didn’t take on your new job amidst celebration in the way most others before you did, after winning an election. In fact, it was quite the opposite. Gota maama had just been chased away, and your own home had been set on fire. Only DB took on that job under more difficult circumstances.

There were two types of reactions to your election. Some opposed it, arguing that you had already been rejected by the people and sent home, only to return to Parliament through the National List. Others supported it, saying that you are the best man for the job at this time.

Since a month has passed, Uncle Ranil, I feel it is time to take stock. After all, Paradise is in crisis, we need quick solutions for our immediate issues and you have only 27 months left to rule – unless, of course, you plan to run for another term, which many suspect you do.  

You succeeded in getting us enough gas. The queues for petrol are getting shorter. There is some degree of normalcy. You have also managed to get rid of the boys and girls camping at Galle Face in the name of the ‘aragalaya’ - though the real ‘aragalaya’ is far from over.

You have also presented the 19th Amendment again. To get that through Parliament, you need the help of the ‘pohottuwa’ chaps to get a two-thirds majority. That shouldn’t be a problem because the amendment takes away many of your powers and gives them to, Dinesh. Are you happy with that?

However, Uncle Ranil, we are yet to see a new Cabinet. There isn’t much enthusiasm for your invitation for an ‘all-Party’ government. We are still being governed by Gota maama’s Cabinet and its same, old, tired faces – with Sabry instead of GL, who was sacked for the crime of supporting Dullas.

We heard this same Cabinet is proposing that those allegedly ‘victimised’ by the ‘yahapalanaya’ regime be compensated with millions of rupees. That will be ironical – and comical too – if you approve that as head of the Cabinet, considering that you were the chief architect of ‘yahapalanaya’!

Then, we also heard you say, Uncle Ranil, that you will get British help to probe the Easter Attacks – again. I thought we already had a Presidential Commission to do exactly that – and that inquiry found fault with you for what they called your ‘lax approach’ to extremism which contributed to the attacks!

People are also worried about the way in which justice is dispensed these days. We saw Mervyn being summoned for what he did 15 years ago. Also called for questioning was champion swimmer Julian. Maybe Roshan Mahanama and Nanda Malini are next, for they too supported the ‘aragalaya’.

There is also an unusual delay in pardoning Ranjan. We don’t agree with everything he said or did but it seems unfair when murderers are pardoned and others are jailed for stating the obvious. You called Stalin when he was detained, but please don’t speak to Ranjan – you know what will happen next!

All this, while those who stole billions roam free, continuing to enjoy the privileges of power and still calling the shots. We know you have to rely on the ‘pohottuwa’ in Parliament, but, now that you are the big boss, surely you can start to crack the whip on them, just like you did on those at Galle Face?

Or, is it that yours is a ‘Udin Ranil, Yatin Basil’ (Apparently Ranil, but really Basil) government? Is Uncle Basil telling you who you should appoint as ministers and governors from the ‘pohottuwa’ camp? If that is so, you better get your Cabinet sworn-in before the new Amendment is passed!

When you do, if there are dozens of ministers and even more State ministers, the people won’t like it. They will like it even less, if you start poaching people from opposition parties. We are in this crisis because we didn’t have a proper Opposition. We shouldn’t be making that same mistake again.

Your biggest problem, however, may not be any of this but what might happen sometime soon. We know you intervened to get Gota maama a three-month visa in Thailand, and publicly said it is not the right time for him to return but, as we all know, he is a stubborn man and he wants to return.

If Gota maama returns, some will rally around him and your task will become even more difficult. Some are saying he should return to Parliament on the National List. Dinesh could then lose his job. Then, if that amendment is passed, we will all be back at square one. Think about it, Uncle Ranil.

Yours Truly,

Punchi Putha

PS: Previously, with five Rajapaksas in the Cabinet, we had a government ‘of the Rajapaksas for the Rajapaksas, by the Rajapaksas’. After having you in office for one month, Uncle Ranil, some say that we now have a government ‘of the Rajapaksas, for the Rajapaksas by a Wickremesinghe’!