Appreciations
View(s):Unforgettable, that’s what you are Granny
Sally May Hulugalle
It is truly impossible to put into words what my Granny (18.06.1941 – 10.07.2024) meant to the people who loved her. She was a multifaceted, larger than life person whose presence was an explosion of love, colour and selflessness. A Mother Teresa-esque figure might be the best description, and is certainly the view I had of her for as long as I can remember.
For 38 years, she dedicated her life to the non-profit charity she co-founded, Nest, through which she fiercely advocated for the mentally ill long before it was acceptable or fashionable to do so. She was a profoundly kind, hard-working and deeply religious person, whose heart was an infinite well of love.
There was never a moment she didn’t think of others. Whether it was the people she helped through Nest, her friends, her family, or the pure and unwavering devotion she had for my Grandpa (her husband of nearly 57 years), her capacity for love and selflessness knew no bounds. For all the acts of service we knew about, there was so much more Granny did for others hidden from view. Her home, ‘Royden’, was a shrine to her loved ones – nearly every inch of the walls of that place was papered in photographs of family and friends that Granny would assiduously print out. And for all the love she shared, I hope she knew how much we tried to give it back to her. Because she was so loved.
Spending time with Granny over the years was a collective highlight of the lives of all six of her children and nine grandchildren. Although we lived on four different continents around the world, we always looked forward to our time with her and Grandpa. And I have never seen love like the love in my Grandpa’s eyes when he held my Granny.
She taught us all so much. Like the difference between real kindness and mere niceness, and the importance of judging someone not by what they have or what they look like, but by the contents of their character (and there was no one better than Granny at judging character). She also taught us there was nothing wrong with being a bit different and to lean into our eccentricities!
Granny may have been a larger than life, unstoppable force, but my favourite moments with her were the quieter ones we had together. The day before she died, I told her the time I was happiest in all my life was when I visited her in Sri Lanka from Australia by myself when I was 12. Granny and I would spend weeks sitting up and drawing together on her bed, she’d give me the best life advice to help with all the things pressing on my 12-year-old mind, and I would say silly things to try making her laugh. More than anything, I am glad I was able to spend so much time with her throughout my life and also before she passed away. Granny was with me when I was born, she helped bring me into this world, and I was with her when she left.
I will also always treasure the memory of singing showtunes (admittedly, quite badly) from the Sound of Music and Mary Poppins to Granny in the hospital – she loved musicals and dancing and I’m so happy her last few hours were filled with the music and vibrancy she loved and shared in her own life.
Granny’s formidable artistic talents also should not be forgotten – she was humble about her talents, but anyone could see the genius in her art. Many people are lucky to have a piece of Granny’s artworks on the colourful cards she created and sold through Tall Tales all across Sri Lanka. And of course, in classic-Granny fashion, she gave away all the proceeds from her art back to Nest.
Granny’s priest, Father Julian, said something which really struck me at her funeral – that we all have three deaths. Our first death is when our spirit leaves this earth, our second death is when our body is buried, and our third and final death is when those who would remember us and talk about us have also all died. When I recall the dozens of people at Granny’s funeral whose lives were forever changed because they met her, who were given help and dignity because of her service, and who then went on to live fulfilled lives and pass on her love to other people, including their own children, I know that it will be a long time before Granny is truly gone.
Although cancer has taken her away from this earth too early, Granny’s warm and twinkling brown eyes, mass of white hair and statuesque height will live on large and bold in all our memories for a very, very long time.
Anoushka William
her granddaughter
Memories of your love are what we are left with
Shanmuganathan Maheshwaran
Dear Mahesh Anna,
A year has passed since you left us, yet your memory remains as fresh as ever in our hearts. We lost a beautiful soul, dear friend, and guiding light.
Each day is spent reliving old memories, and at the end of the day, the pain of our loss looms large, haunting us. They say that forgetting is a blessing, and that time heals all wounds, but there are some sorrows that cannot be healed by anything.
The eulogies, speeches, and praises we offer when someone is alive are not permanent. It is the words spoken after their death that reveal to the world how they lived their life.
Experience has taught us that we can carry the unbearable sorrow, unable to set it aside or escape it. We can only sink into it and dream, hiding the weight of our emotional wounds behind a hollow smile.
Whenever I think of my brother, I see a vibrant, enthusiastic man with a great sense of humour, always full of life and energy. He was a man of discipline and integrity, and his smiling face was a constant source of inspiration.
He was loved and respected by everyone in the village, regardless of caste or religion. He was known as “Mahesh Anna” by all, and he had a vast network of friends from all walks of life. He was always ready to lend a helping hand to those in need.
Mahesh Anna was passionate about travelling. He loved to explore new places, and he would often take his friends and family with him on his adventures.
Memories flow like tears. As I turn the pages of the past, memories flood my mind like tears. My heart aches.
Your face never lost its smile. Those who spoke to you never saw a frown on your face.
But we have closed your eyes and bid you farewell. Why this cruel fate?
You died only once, Mahesh Anna. But now, every time we remember you, we die a little too.
Why did your gentle soul leave us? Why did you leave us with only memories of your love?
Mahesh Anna, you have not left us. You live in our memories.
Rest in peace, dear Mahesh Anna, you were a beacon of light in our lives. You had a heart of gold. You taught us to cherish every moment and live life to the fullest. You are dearly missed, but your memory will forever be etched in our hearts.
Jayanthi Ramesh
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