Jungle Telegraph

2nd May 1999

Crude and inhuman

An angry Navy Commander, Vice Admiral Cecil Tissera, has ordered a Court Martial against two Lieutenants attached to the Eastern Command Headquarters in Trincomalee for crude and inhuman ragging of other ranks.

He has already placed them under suspension for pouring hot water down the shoulders of some sailors and midshipmen. Some have also been burnt with cigarette butts and are now displaying sore wounds on their chest.

That, unfortunately, was how the two young officers thought the new recruits should be treated. "The Navy has no place for such people," Vice Admiral Tissera was heard telling senior officials.

New image

Air Force Commander, Air Marshal Jayalath Weerakoddy, who is on a mission to give his service a whole new image was in for a rude shock after a meeting with his top rungers recently.

He had invited them to discuss ways and means of improving the service. He began by asking them what shortcomings existed and how they could be rectified.

One officer said they were only entitled to one vehicle whilst the equivalent of their rank in the Army, Colonels and above had the privilege of using two.

Air Marshal wee-rakoddy was soon to remind them that the meeting was to find ways and means of further improving the service and not to increase their perks.

Shopping spree

The top snooper, now on a whirlwind European tour, insiders say, has carried with him a lengthy shopping list. He was seen in Old Blighty early this week buying up many a thing.

Sleuths under scrutiny

Sleuths who have been busy for months trying to bust a spy ring were in for a rude shock.

The husband and wife combination, who were among those under watch, fled Colombo without telling even their close friends.

Now some others, including a couple of sleuths, have come under scrutiny. One is not sure whether it is for tipping them off or for becoming double agents.

Some of the big wigs are tight lipped over the embarrassment caused.

Private show

The big boss of an out fit made up of female cadres had some unusual advice to her immediate subordinates.

She said ordinary cadres should be periodically exposed to physical examination (privately of course) to ascertain whether they were pregnant. Any detection should be immediately brought to her attention, she has ordered.

All because there had been complaints of a few becoming pregnant.

LTTE via satellite

Snoopers have had a interesting breakthrough in the recent months. They have managed to obtain the satellite phone numbers (at least a couple) of the LTTE in the Wanni.

Like in journalism, sources are most sacrosanct even among snoopers. But, somehow or other, the word has got out. Some are now talking about the man who gave the info !!!

Special Assignment

Editorial/Opinion Contents