Saying good bye is not one of my favourite things. It's one of those things that brings a lump to my throat and make me want to cry and this after having had to endure so many goodbyes to family members and friends, over the years.
Given the nomadic life I have had during my younger years, goodbyes were quite routine. It was a difficult exercise because after having settled into a new place and made new friends, having to uproot oneself after a few years and moving on, was not easy. It meant saying goodbye to many people I had grown fond of. It was like losing a little part of me every time we had to move.
All the sadness about parting would soon be replaced by the excitement of moving into a new environment and getting to know new people and places but soon it was time for goodbyes again.
Having done it so many times over, one would think I am more immune to the whole idea by now but sadly it is not so. It's not like I start shedding tears every time I say goodbye to someone, but deep inside I always get that feeling of emptiness. I think it has to do with the fear I have that I may never see them again and share all the wonderful times with them once more. I had two of my siblings here on holiday a few weeks ago and then when it was time for them to go, I was back to feeling despondent even we have said goodbye to each other so many times before. While driving my sister to the airport to see her off, I was thinking how her time with us had flown by so fast. Since having kids, saying goodbye to them even for brief periods away from home, has been even more difficult.
Writing this article has made me think that sometimes we don't appreciate people when they area around, we don't spend enough time with them and tell them we care and basically take them for granted. But when its time to say goodbye, you have a million things on your mind you want to tell them before they go and then there is no time for it and you are left with regrets.
My sister got a Chinese book of friendship as a farewell gift, many years ago. This book contains many poems and sayings on the subject, but some of my favourites are ones dealing with "farewell." I read them over and over again, every time I lay my hands on the book. It makes me realize that what ever corner of the world we may come from, human feelings are the same.
I'd like to share one of my favourite poems from the book on "farewell" because I am certain anyone who has had to say goodbye to a loved one can relate to it. The fleeing of emptiness one feels when having to say goodbye is so well illustrated in it. It reads as follows :-
"It was not long ago that smiling we met again
And now it is farewell and time for tears.
Parting is always hard to bear
And I dread to enter the deserted city.
It's cold and the distant mountains are clearly seen,
It's dark and the long river rushes on.
No sooner the rope is loosen than your boat is gone,
And I am left standing here staring at the distance.
When Romeo said to Juliet, parting is sweet sorrow, he was obviously thinking of their next meeting. I'd like to see it in the same way. Goodbye doesn't have to be forever. There is always the hope we will meet once again with our loved ones and continue with what was left unsaid and undone.
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