Mirror Magazine

Mirror Magazine

When you want it most
By Dilini Algama
This is an appeal to all those scientists out there, budding and otherwise, who wish to be shot into fame by unravelling mysteries so common yet undisclosed. Please stop trying to find bug-eyed aliens and elusive yetis and look into these “occurrences” because they are driving me insane.

The first is the law - what you crave to eat is not good for you and what you don’t want to eat is entirely good for your health. There, I’m sure you’ve come across that one. In Western countries the culprits are apparently broccoli and spinach, but here scheming mothers try in every possible way to feed you raisins. They hide in cakes, camouflage them in fruit salads and all the while you are driven to say “Does this contain raisins?” in faithful abstinence from those awfully revolting little things. Still your mother will say in a stern voice, “You will not get up from this table till you’ve eaten all those raisins you’ve hidden under the table cloth.” “They are good for you,” ends your father in that age-old sentence you have come to dread and despise.

But take a piece or two of pineapple dripping with its tantalising juice and mother is sure to say, “Don’t eat too much of it. It’s heaty.” Or try reaching for the third helping of fried chicken and the doctor being interviewed on television will promptly say “Too much of fried food is not good for you.” See what I mean?

The second mystery is that if you cut a finger it will always hit something everytime you move your hand. For example, let us take the last finger. Normally you don’t even know it’s there. It’s such a harmless little thing. But if you accidentally cut it, then the fun begins. You lay your hand on the table and Bro-Boy will bang that heavy mug of hot tea - right on that pinkie. You reach for the pen in your pen holder and the sharpened pencil jabs you right on that pinkie. You prepare fish for lunch and the bones will prick you - right on the pinkie. Get it?

Here’s another, Uncle Theodosius is delivering an elaborate account of his pet dogs, again! You check the time, it’s 10.00 am. Ten minutes later you check again, then it’s 10.05 a.m. You shake the watch because you are sure it’s malfunctioning and your father frowns, at you and takes it away. Feeling miserable you stare at uncle Theodosius with a cold look hoping he’ll get the message. He doesn’t.

But if it’s your favourite hour-long TV programme which features that hunk of an actor. Ring! The hour’s up. How does your friend know to ring you right when you are in the shower whereas you waited one hour for her call? Telepathy? Sixth sense? Why do you always spill sauce on your favourite white top? (and not on that hideous gray tee-shirt?)

How come you find long lost items when you are looking for something else, but NOT when you are looking for that specific thing? Any clues? I’m stumped, baffled and mystified by these, aren’t you?

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