Mirror Magazine

Mirror Magazine

On track with changes
Change they say is the one constant in life, and so it helps when you know how to cope with it. N. Dilshath Banu takes a closer look at the concept
Turning points in history mark the struggles for freedom that came as revolutions. Empires crash while at the same time new empires replace them. Anthropologists and sociologists study the traces left by our ancestors and mark the achievements by the human species on this earth. Looking back, one cannot deny that the world is constantly evolving. We are experiencing “Change.”

Everything in this world is changing, minute-by-minute. Things were different ten years before and it’ll be different in another ten years. Our body is a living example of change and renewal. As cells die, new cells are born to replace the outdated cells within the body, reminding us that life and our atmosphere are changing in this busy world where you fail to notice change.

Change is a paradox. It offers great opportunities for learning more about you. It’s about learning to perceive things in different ways. It tests your response: do you resist change or do you ignore change? Do you try to balance opposing forces or do you go with the flow of change? People have been dealing with change successfully and unsuccessfully, since time began. Unfortunately, many people respond to change with anxiety.

Many see change as their enemy. Our generation has always been taught to follow what our parents, teachers and elders told us to do. As a result of that conditioning, we are afraid to try out new things. Many of us only see the negative side of moving on from school, settling down in a new neighborhood, failing exams, etc. Negative stress depletes energy and that whole new idea of transformation becomes a scary road for most of us.

The corner stone in our society is passing examinations – O/levels, A/levels and then university to get a good job. Every one of us has conditioned our mindset to the above philosophy, which stipulates, “These exams are the basis in your life.” However, today, the job markets demand people who are innovative and creative. Yet, how many of us understand that innovation is change.

Rubina (23) says, “Changes take place very rapidly these days and you need to adjust to these changes at an equal pace. Adjusting to surroundings will help you succeed. Change is also very good, as doing the same thing everyday tends to be boring and routine. I think changes are exciting if you adjust to it and think of it in term of challenges.”

PJ (20) who agrees says, “Society likes change when it’s positive and it goes according to their will. But in the case of a negative change, society rejects it, because it means a lot of pressure and things will not be the same. If any particular change is necessary in my life, I’ll take steps to change myself. If change occurred without my expecting it, and this change is something which I don’t consider necessary, I will adapt according to the change.”

Looking at changes in society, twenty-one-year-old Rashid says, “Society has changed immensely. On one hand, people are taking some serious things very lightly. For example, if we take relationships, people change their partners very frequently. I don’t agree with this as a good change. Most of them cannot commit themselves to a particular relationship, as they are absorbed in their work. These changes often confuse people. But people should accept change as an inevitable thing. However, we must take control of the change and never let change control us.”

Christina (22) admits that life cannot exist without change. “If we take our lives, from childhood, we have evolved into adulthood with many changes. People are afraid of change, because they are uncertain about the direction of the change. It is the same with examinations. Before we sat for O/levels and A/levels we were really anxious. Once it’s over or when we start to deal with change, it is not as scary a thing as we thought. I like change and I do accept change. And I am not afraid of change. It’s the obstacles in life that make you a better person.”

For Shanaka (23) change is part of life. “One thing that doesn’t change is change. A lot of us do pass all our examinations without knowing the real purpose of passing them. Everyone is made to think that they are the only important things in life and people are not open to any other option, because taking a different route means change.”

Shanaka added that if there is no change in life it’s the same as death. “Lots of people die without even knowing what it takes to be a human being. If you say yes to life, then you should be able see beyond the route that you are very familiar with, and try new options,” he says.

Rusiru (19) says that no matter what happens, we have to live with change. “What’s important is that we should be able to manipulate the changes we go through to our advantage. Whether change is for good or bad we should be able to look at it positively. That’s possible as long as we have an optimistic outlook to life. After all, your ability to win or lose the game of life depends on how well you adapt to changes.”

“Change is about a different twist to your life when you least expect it. It’s like meeting crossroads on your way, and it’s your choice to travel the road you prefer. Change is also an obstacle that’s stuck in your usual path, which will then allow you to find alternative routes, a better route in your life. It’s a new way – a way which you have never travelled before,” says Dr. Asoka N. Jinadasa, senior PR Consultant at Rowland PR.

He added that lots of people are resistant to change, because change takes them out of their comfort zones. “It’s the risk of losing security and the things that are familiar. People have programmed their minds to live in their comfort zones and when change strikes, most of us go according to the rule of what others plan for us, as we do not wish to make a change.”

Says Dr. Jinadasa, “Today change happens very fast. Whether it’s economic, social or technological, change is inevitable. Within a few minutes, the tsunami changed the whole of Sri Lanka.”

“Passing examinations and entering university is not a bad thing, if it makes you happy and if that helps you to reach your goal,” he continues. “The fun begins when you fail your examinations. This is a change. Then at that time, you have to ask yourself whether it is necessary for you to re-do the examinations or whether your path for success demands another kind of study programme. Unfortunately, many don’t advocate that kind of change.”

“Passing examinations needs a certain amount of discipline. It’s not the contents or the syllabus which matter in examinations or degrees, but the discipline that helps you to achieve competency in life.”

Further elaborating on change, Dr. Jinadasa says that change reforms you. It helps you to have focus in your life and stretch your ability to achieve things that you never thought you could manage. He also adds that most of us do not have goals in our lives. “As we don’t have goals, we go according to what others want from us. It’s like driving without a definite map. You don’t know what your destination is, but just drive according to the direction in which others want you to go. This makes you resistant to change.”

Before dealing with change, Dr, Jinadasa stresses that we must understand that dealing with change is all about our attitude. “Change is in the mindset, it’s totally an attitude. Deeper implications of change involve how you direct your attitudes. Negative feelings such as fear, anger, hatred, jealousy etc. are all caused, because of our inability to change.”

Having said that change is all in our attitude, Dr. Jinadasa suggests that we should cultivate a change of attitude in our mind consciously. “Everyday, before you go to sleep think about what kind of changes you have met. And how you have dealt with it. For example, suppose you lost your wallet or lost your files as a result of a computer virus. You have to think of how you have dealt with each of these situations – positively or negatively. If it’s positively, then plan the due steps. If it’s negatively, then examine how to act in a positive manner and think about the next step.”

Most importantly, Dr. Jinadasa says one should practice this pattern. Otherwise, it’ll be just a theory, waiting to be practiced. Also there’s another equally important factor which determines your ability to change, i.e. the people whom you associate with. If you surround yourself with a lot of conventional people, who will react negatively to change, then you will also be like them. If you want to build the ability to change, surround yourself with people who have positive mindsets. If you wanted to be a tennis champion you have to play with tennis champions,” says Dr. Jinadasa.

History taught us that the world changed not because of wealthy and intelligent communities, but because of visionary leaders who have the strength to adapt to change and guide communities accordingly. If you study the autobiography of any great achiever in the world, you’ll notice that all of them used only one unchanging rule – adaptability to change! So, say yes to change and arm yourself with courage to walk the path you never thought you would go down. Maybe, you would find an unexplored treasure in Pandora’s box.

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