Appreciations

“After a long illness bravely borne”, are words one sometimes reads in obituaries about unknown people. I learned its full implication only when such an illness struck my friend, Ranee Kadirgamar – erect, always beautifully attired, smiling and serene, Ranee who died on October 22 after three years of a debilitating disease, gallantly borne.

Her posture and her attire inevitably changed due to the nature of her illness, but her smile and her serenity remained unchanged to the end.

Ranee (nee Abraham) was a product of Jaffna College where, besides being a good student, she shone in extra-curricular activities like English drama, singing, oratory, Girl Guides and the Junior YWCA. In 1958 Ranee married Alagan Kadirgamar, the young and dynamic General Secretary of the Central YMCA. She was teaching in Jaffna at the time, but later joined Alagan in Colombo and taught English in government schools until she retired in 1985 as Vice Principal of the Rajagiriya Convent.

I came to know Ranee well many years ago when she was the energetic Hony. Secretary of the Kollupitiya Methodist Women’s Fellowship. She also served on the Bible Society Women’s Committee and the YMCA Women’s Auxiliary.

The Kadirgamar’s had three gifted daughters – Damayanthi, now resident in England, Priyanthi, now in Sydney, Australia, and the youngest, Shiranthi, living in Sri Lanka and with whom Alagan and Ranee moved in, in the latter years. Talking to me, the daughters recalled their mother’s skills in music and singing, cake decorating, sewing and embroidery. She was a devoted mother and homemaker. Her winsome personality drew people to her, so that she had a wide circle of friends. It seemed apt that at her funeral service Rev. Duleep Fernando quoted St. Paul’s words from Romans chapter 16, about a woman named Phoebe who “served the church and has been a good friend to many”.

I recall how, after my husband’s death last year, when she was prevented by her illness from visiting me, Ranee would not only telephone me when she could, but would regularly send Alagan round to see me and he would invariably say, “Ranee reminded me that I hadn’t dropped in on you this week and she wanted me to come and see how you were.” She showed even more concern when I underwent surgery on my knee. She was a caring friend who never became wrapped up in her own increasing infirmities.

Rev. Fernando said something else that has stayed in my mind. He referred to the National awards that Alagan had received in recognition of his services to the community. “Ranee may not have qualified for that kind of award, but Alagan was able to render the whole-hearted service he gave, mainly because of Ranee’s unstinted support and understanding. Alagan, in his turn, gave her all the tender loving care and support that Ranee needed during these last few years.” So, Ranee was upheld to the end by her enduring faith in God, by the love of family and friends and by her own courageous and uncomplaining attitude.

Her beloved 9-year-old grandson, Yudheesh, came into the bedroom to comfort his Grandpa on the night of the funeral. Yudheesh said, “Don’t be sad – I am here with you, and God will take care of Ammamma.” Ranee is surely one of the blessed, for whom all the trumpets would have sounded on the other side.