It's as though --- Nero fiddled while Rome burned

By Rypvanwinkle

My Dear Mahinda Maama,
I thought I must write to you because everybody seems to blame you for everything these days, regardless of whether it is disappearing packets of milk powder or attacks on Air Force camps, but I guess that is part of your job description, isn't it?

I don't want to say anything about what happened at Anuradhapura, because people might call me a traitor but I must say it won't look good on your CV, Mahinda maama, especially when Gota is going around saying that the war is almost over!

Well, at least they could have saved your blushes by getting the numbers right but they didn't do that either, did they? So, you had to get good old Ratnasiri to tell us that the number of planes down was eight and not three as was earlier announced-and not eighteen as claimed by the Greens either!

But then, who can blame you-or anyone else in your team for that matter? After all, most of you were busy fighting a different kind of war these past few days because all of you were defending Millie, that chap who has a no-confidence motion brought against him!
I really can't understand what you see in that chap, Mahinda maama. He is a chap who was parachuted into prominence by the Green Man and what does he do? He stabs the Green Man in his back and becomes bosom pals with you. Can you just imagine what he would do to you, in similar circumstances?

I must also say, Mahinda maama that these chaps you have picked up from the greens are real odd balls. Now, take Mano, that son of a Diyawadana Nilame for instance. Rightly or wrongly he has got some scribe arrested and everybody is screaming about media freedom. With friends like these, who needs Louise Arbour, Mahinda maama?

And talking of scribes I must also say, Mahinda maama, your recent television performance with the scribes was not that convincing. Why, there was that chap who claimed to be a Nutritionist who was telling us why we shouldn't be drinking powdered milk and said we can't drink cows' milk either because cows were so expensive to import! Where did you get him from, Mahinda maama-did Uncle Ranil send him to you too, just like he sent Bandula to you?

Then, Mahinda maama, we observed you also taking Thonda back into the fold offering his team a few portfolios quite generously. I think we all know that he will support only the winning team at the next election and he would do that whether you offer him a portfolio or not, so why bother?

Mahinda maama, I seriously hope that our cricket team does well in Australia and maybe Murali will even break a record or two because that is the only way this country of ours is going to stop worrying about other issues in the coming weeks!

Yours truly,
Punchi Putha
PS- Mahinda maama, you must be also busy these days preparing the budget. I can bet my last two thousand rupee note that it will be a 'sunshine' budget where you will print some more money and give us all a wage hike, but my only fear is that you will be given a reception similar to what Basil malli got when he entered Parliament. But then, you can always rely on Mervyn to protect you, right, because after all, you protect him?