The Buddha has declared, as recorded in the Anguttara Nikaya that two kinds of individuals are rare in the world. They are those who volunteer to help others in need (Pubbakari) and those who are grateful (Katavedi). Generally by nature, people are not grateful. So, it is a noble quality to be cultivated.
It is stated in the Dhamma that one should not help others expecting gratitude but it should be undertaken because it is a good and wholesome action. If we help others expecting gratitude and it is not forthcoming, we would be disappointed and unhappy because of our expectation.
This would also diminish the wholesome action of extending assistance to those in need. Nevertheless, those who help would naturally be happy if their good action is appreciated and remembered by the recipient. Thus, an effort should be made to remember the help given and make the giver aware of it when possible.
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| It is said that as a sign of gratitude to the Bodhi tree that gave Him protection on the night of enlightenment, Lord Buddha kept gazing at this tree for one week with unblinking eyes. Image courtesy gangesindina.com |
Gratitude is considered a noble virtue in Buddhism and in the Maha Mangala Sutta it is described as an auspicious characteristic. The relevant words in the Sutta read as follows. "Reverence, humility, contentment, gratitude and listening to the Dhamma at the opportune moment. This is a highest blessing''. In the commentaries gratitude is defined as acknowledging and remembering constantly a good turn, whether it be great or small, done by one being to another.
The Buddha as mentioned in the Anguttara Nikaya has described gratitude as a characteristic of a virtuous man (Sappurisa) and the absence of this virtue as a characteristic of a ignoble man (Asappurisa). Ingratitude is also mentioned as one of the several mental phenomena that has to be eradicated to develop the highest levels of concentration, namely, the Jhanas.
Why is gratitude a rare quality? When one receives assistance from another at that moment usually one expresses appreciation and most of them are sincere in such declarations. However, with time most tend to forget the good action that benefited them. Thus, the noble quality of gratitude has to be cultivated by remembering such actions and being mindful to refer to them on appropriate occasions.
Sometimes, it is difficult to reciprocate the good action that has been done. For one thing there may be the lack of resources or opportunity to offer help. On the other hand, the person who helped may be doing so well in life and may require nothing. Nevertheless, gratitude could be expressed in other ways such as by mentioning the favour done on appropriate occasions, wishing them well in their activities, specially in their spiritual development to overcome the sufferings of Samsara and realize the goal of Nibbana.
emembering the good done by others would also be helpful when strong friendly relationships face turbulent times due to just one unfortunate incident. At such times there is a tendency to think only of the deficiencies of the friend forgetting the numerous good wholesome deeds of his over a long period of time. Remembering the good deeds of others in the past would enable us to overcome any ill-will that arises by recent misdemeanors. Thus, for good social relationships the development of gratitude would be a useful factor.
The Buddha taught the importance of this noble virtue by His own conduct. As a sign of gratitude to the Bodhi tree that gave Him protection on the night of enlightenment, He kept gazing at this tree for one week with unblinking eyes. Moreover, when deciding to preach the Dhamma that He had realized by His own effort, He thought first of Alarakalama and then Uddakaramaputta, under whom he studied for sometime in the quest for the Truth. On realizing that both had died a few days earlier, He delivered His first sermon on the Four Noble Truths, setting in motion the wheel of the Dhamma, to the five ascetics who had rendered great service to him in practicing austerity.
There is also a Jataka story related by the Buddha in connection with gratitude. The Cullasetthi Jataka records how a man named Cullantevasika became very rich by overhearing a statement made by Cullasetthi and showed his gratitude to the latter. Cullasetthi while touring the city saw a dead mouse in the street and said that an intelligent man can make a fortune even with this dead mouse. Hearing this statement Cullantevasika took the dead mouse with him and before long sold it for an insignificant price. With that he bought some honey and sold it with a profit. In this way he made a substantial fortune before long. One day he took thousand pieces of gold to Cullasetthi as a mark of gratitude although he merely overheard some good advise.
Gratitude is a meritorious action that would stand in good stead in ones journey in Samsara, the cycle of births and deaths, in this life and in future lives. On the other hand, with the practice of gratitude with mindfulness one would be able to win the respect and the goodwill of the giver. Thus, on any future occasion if his help is sought he would be most willing to assist noting the great quality of gratitude of the recipient in the past.
There are many cases where help given is acknowledged and appreciated for sometime after a good act and later tend to fade away from one's memory. Then that important act of benevolence is forgotten and one may even lose contact with the generous giver. However, one who has cultivated the noble quality of gratitude will never forget past favours and would express it in ways such as wishing him well on certain occasions and perhaps even by the presentation of token gifts.
Gratitude could be expressed by thoughts of Metta towards the person who had helped one in time of need. It costs materially nothing but only a noble thought which could be expressed even if one has no meaningful material resources and even if one is confined to the bed but with mental faculties in a reasonable condition.
In the practice of Dhamma, Sati or mindfulness, an important item in the noble eight fold path, is a crucial factor. So, it is in remembering and not forgetting the good done by one to another.
Thus, gratitude is a hallmark of a man of good character and every effort should be made to cultivate and develop this noble quality for the good of oneself and the good of the giver.
Buddhist - the Vesak Annual 2553-2009.
(Colombo YMBA)
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