My Dear Dayananda,
I thought I must write to you because you seem to be the man of the moment these days, grabbing headlines even more than Mahinda maama who won the election.
Of course, Dayananda, the other reason why I thought I must write to you was because I heard you say that you would continue to hold your job-because if I am not senile and losing my memory like some public officers who should have retired a long time ago-I distinctly remember you telling us that after that election, you would not step into your office!
Pardon me, Dayananda, there was a time right until this election, when we respected you and were happy that a man of your integrity was holding the responsible job that you have, even if we lesser mortals don't have luxuries like independent elections commissions.
Why, even during this election we marvelled at the way you complained -- tearing the little hair that you have remaining -- about the state media and the police and how your instructions to them found their way invariably to the waste paper basket.
Of course, we expected you to do something about it rather than being satisfied with summoning press conferences and complaining endlessly. To be honest, when you did nothing, we were a little disappointed.
Then we were a little surprised when you said-before the election, mind you -- that the election will be free of fraud and fair and that there was absolutely no room for anyone to tamper with any vote. You were either being very naïve or very ingenious -- and now we know which one it was!
But even then we had some confidence in you because you did say that you are disgusted with the entire system and will not step into your office after the big election-although, frankly, there were quite a few who thought that it wouldn't make a difference anyway!
Then we had all that drama about the big election, and what a bagful of rumours we had that day! Why, if you were contesting for one of those 'Super Star' competitions, you would have won hands down -- there were so many SMSs in your name that day!
But lo and behold, you did make an appearance at the end of it all to give your certificate that the election had been 'successfully concluded'. But it was not before saying once again that you had gone well beyond the call of duty and that therefore, it would be your last election.
We were a trifle surprised to hear you praise the Police Chief who you said was one of the best. After all, it was only a few days ago that you yourself had said that you wouldn't write to him anymore because all those letters ended in the waste paper basket! The Police Chief was the best, yes-only we didn't know what he was so good at until much later!
We did sympathise with you even on that day after the election, because you spoke of the 'aathathiya' that you had been subjected to and how there would be no one to look after you, should any harm befall you. And, as many people remarked, the plight that you were in showed in your face that day.
So, imagine our surprise, dear Dayananda, when you turn up just a few days later with not even enough time to have a decent vacation to announce that you would do it all over again which I suppose would be from the same office that you vowed not to set sights on after the previous big election!
Where on earth did all that 'aathathiya' disappear, dear Dayananda? If you found a miracle cure for it through some faith healer, please do let all of us know about it because, after hearing that you will preside at the next election, most of us are having that same 'aathathiya' these days!
Of course, Dayananda, there are many who are now saying that with Commissioners like you, who needs elections? Why, we could even save the country a lot of money by not having a general election and having a 'computer 'jilmart' instead!
Anyway, I have to stop short of wishing you a happy retirement after the next elections because, who knows, they may even keep you going till 2017!
Yours truly,
Punchi Putha
PS-But if you do retire and are on the lookout for a job, I am sure you have all the qualifications to make a good politician: not keeping your promises, changing your tune from time to time and of course, keeping a straight face through it all. And I hear they are looking for a new Prime Minister these days and you are the best 'yes man' I can think of for the job, Dayananda -- why don't you apply? |
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