A courageous woman who faced life’s challenges with remarkable grace

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Balapuwaduge Annette Agnus Perera (nee Mendis)

April 22, 1934-August 19, 2024

With the heaviest heart, I pen this tribute to my beloved mother, Annette Perera.

Ammi passed away on August 19, 2024, in a private hospital at the age of 90. This was the first time she had been hospitalised, aside from the times she gave birth to the four of us. Her life was a testament to strength, grace, and unwavering faith.

Ammi received her education at St. Mary's College, Matugama, where she met my father, who had joined the staff as a music teacher. A talented singer, Ammi played a pivotal role in one of the renowned musical drama productions at the college, which my father directed. Their shared love for music blossomed into romance after she left school, and they were married on April 28, 1956, at St. Mary's Church, Matugama. Ammi served as a chorister while my father was the pianist at St. Mary's Church. Later, when we moved to Kuruwita, as my father took over the Rubber Research Institute as Superintendent, Ammi continued her service at the Church of St. Peter and Paul, Ratnapura, with unwavering dedication.

After relocating to Panadura in 1975, following my father’s appointment at the Rubber Research Institute in Datenfield, Agalawatte, her devotion deepened. After my father passed away in 1993, she took on leadership roles within the Sacred Heart Society of Our Lady of Sorrows Church and the church choir. As the group leader of Zone 8, she diligently visited homes for monthly collections and encouraged families to engage in church activities. One of her unique hobbies was distributing prayer cards and photocopying articles about faith, which she always kept in her handbag, ready to share with others. Ammi was a shepherd to her community, always working to gather the flock and spread God's word. Her deep faith extended to encouraging me, my siblings and their spouses, and her six granddaughters to stay connected to church life, whether through serving as altar boys, lecturing, singing, or ministering to the congregation.

She never forgot a birthday or anniversary, meticulously recording dates, addresses, and phone numbers in her diary. She was particularly dedicated to caring for priests, often calling them to check in on their well-being and offering advice on healthy living. This kindness was so appreciated that many priests came to bless and pray for her during her hospital stay and her final farewell.

As her youngest child, I held a special place in her heart. She never missed celebrating my birthdays, always ensuring I had a new outfit and something to share with my classmates. A tradition we shared was reading obituary notices together, which taught me the importance of correctly addressing and remembering people, especially in their moments of loss, a ritual I continue to this day. When we moved from Ratnapura to Panadura, Ammi was determined that I enrol in the premier Buddhist school in the country, where my elder brother was studying, despite us being cradle Catholics.

Ammi had a gift for sewing, needlework, and embroidery. If she saw something beautiful, she would recreate it, often better than the original, and lovingly share it with others. She was always impeccably dressed; Ammi never wore anything without ironing it first. She had an eye for matching her clothes perfectly and took her time getting ready for any occasion, never allowing herself to be rushed. After moving in with my elder sister in 2008, she became even more involved with Fatima Church, Maradana, quickly forming close bonds with priests and nuns, treating them like her own children. In her later years, she was lovingly cared for by her two granddaughters, both doctors at the Peradeniya and Ragama Teaching Hospitals. Despite their busy schedules, they took turns attending to Achchi Mummy, whom she considered the best doctor in the world. She eagerly awaited their visits, finding comfort and strength in their care. I must also mention my two sisters, who both diligently took care of her, providing the best comfort a mother could wish for, with the support of a caring son-in-law.

Ammi was a courageous woman who faced life’s challenges with remarkable grace. She never shed a tear, no matter the difficulty, and her resilience was a source of strength for all of us. Her life was a beacon of love, faith, and unwavering commitment to those she held dear, and she will forever be missed.

You will be remembered forever, Ammi. Not a day will end without a prayer for your beautiful soul.