For the last couple of days Sunil has been going around pestering everyone in the neighbourhood with a question. “How many people whoever launched “fasts unto death” have ever died?” he wants to know. The answers he has got so far have been quite varied, but quite a number are agreed that Comrade Wimal, now better known as “Thummulle Somay,” would be doing everyone a favour if he were to add one more digit to the grand total. Others beg to differ.
They say Comrade Wimal’s flair for soap opera has given Sri Lanka better entertainment over the last few days than Hollywood or Bollywood in their entire history. They point out how, right on cue, the UN Secretary General has also entered the stage with a flourish, and he seems to be upstaging Comrade Wimal with his even greater flair for soap opera than Comrade Wimal. Now many parties have sensed that this is the stuff of soap opera par excellence.
Mrs Anumaana’s neighbour who runs a video production outfit has rushed a film crew down to Thummulla junction. He can see a good investment opportunity when he sees one. He says this is “blockbuster material” that can draw more television viewers than the World Cup Finals on Sunday, and he’s not going to miss out. He is also working on another production titled “Sri Lanka government versus UNSG.” The story is about a war crimes investigation on a UN Secretary General who is accused of spreading false rumours.
But it appears now that Mrs Anumaana’s neighbour might have some stiff competition for the broadcasting rights. Initially, Comrade Wimal was merely entertaining a local audience, but now Mr. Ban has entered the stage and grabbed the whole world’s attention with his dramatic statement to international media that made everyone think that the UNDP office in Colombo had been shut down because of Comrade Wimal’s antics.
Now it turns out that not a single UN office in Colombo has been shut down. And Mr. Buhne has not lost his job after all. With all these exciting twists and turns to the plot, and an international flavour being added to the drama, it is rumoured that the Sri Lanka Tourist Promotion Board people want to get in on the act. They are hoping to sell this performance as a “complete package” to international media and they reckon the sky’s the limit for the advertising revenue that will come in from the project.
It is also rumoured that the Export Development Board is hustling for a piece of the action because they say soap opera can, without a doubt, be developed as Sri Lanka’s newest export. They argue that the exports have to be diversified now, what with the loss of export earnings that will be incurred as a result of the loss of GSP+ benefits and everything. They are supremely confident that the foreign exchange loss from the fallout of losing GSP+ will be more than offset by the gains from this New Source of Export Income.
Sunil is placing his bets on the Tourist Board venture, and hopes to sign himself up for a bit-role in the production. He says that since a couple of Bollywood starlets are likely to be involved, chances are the whole of Colombo will be shut down once the shooting gets underway, and he hopes that just like the Bollywood starlets, he too will be able to zoom around Sri Lanka in an S.U.V. with more VIP security personnel in his entourage than the president had at the height of the war.
“So then, what about your decision to become an MP?” asked Mrs. Anumaana. She always suspected that the main attraction in the MP’s job for Sunil was the duty free vehicle that MPs are entitled to. But she had always given him the benefit of the doubt, until now.
Meanwhile Mrs Anumaana heard the disturbing news that someone had died at the Thummulla junction. Sunil says the coroner’s verdict was that he had died of laughing, but Mrs Anumaana is not sure. She has rushed to call Mrs Aandupaksa to find out.
The writer is a senior freelance journalist. |
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